


Texts From Last Year

by anoccasionalcigarette



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Coming Out, Established Relationship, Fluff, Happy Ending, M/M, Nervous Gays, Secret Relationship, Sexting, Some Scandalous Texts Perhaps, Texting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-19
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-17 11:09:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 48
Words: 33,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28848090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anoccasionalcigarette/pseuds/anoccasionalcigarette
Summary: A texting fic that's not a texting fic.Spencer and Aaron have been together for so long it's only a matter of time before the team catches on. In fact the two of them have been trying to figure out how to break this unexpected news to the team. While they drag their feet someone decides to take matters into their own hands. A seemingly average workday is interrupted with the buzz of scandal when the entire office is sent a link to a website with a years worth of private texts.  Thankfully its anonymous but it may not be for long - especially when the BAU is tasked with discovering who is behind it. (Must be a light day crime wise....)
Relationships: Aaron Hotchner/Spencer Reid
Comments: 123
Kudos: 258





	1. The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> The text interludes between each chapter are not chronological - merely topical snippets from past conversations.

S: Why do you carry two phones?

A: The other is for my secret double life.

S: The one you have a copious amount of free time for?

A: One is my work phone and one is for personal use.  
A: Why so interested?

S: "Curiosity is one of the permanent and certain characteristics of a vigorous intellect."

A: Are you asking for my number, Dr. Reid?

S: I thought you were supposed to ask someone for their number before you slept with them?

A: That is exactly the kind of text that should not be sent on a FBI issued cellphone.

S: So if I got another phone I could send sensitive texts?

A: Define sensitive texts.

S: Text that would violate several of the FBI’s fraternization rules and potentially constitute as sexual harassment. 

A: ....  
A: A second phone might not be a bad idea.  
A: For privacy. An added security measure.

S: So if I got another phone would you ask for my number?

A: Yes, but if I follow the precedent you've set then I suppose I'd have to sleep with you first.

S: Would you mind if left work immediately to go take care of something?

A: There is an electronics store just off Rt 1. Be back before the afternoon briefing.


	2. The Crush

It wasn’t unusual that Reid was having technical difficulties. 

It was early. Reid had just gotten in and hadn’t even made a dent in his coffee before running into a problem. A buzz was emanating from his phone but the screen refused to show him why. The frustrated agent slapped his phone against his thigh, as if roughing it up it would intimidate it into delivering his texts again. From her desk Prentiss peered over just in time to witness him shake it a bit too frantically, sending it flying towards the desk behind him. He sheepishly apologized to his disrupted coworker and swiped it off the floor.

Rolling his chair back to his desk he pointedly avoided eye contact with the brunette bystander, who made no attempt to hide her snickering. “You know Reid, I just might know someone who could help you with a technology problem.”

“It’s fine.” Reid said, swallowing. “I don’t like electronics anyway.”

“Okay then. I’m sure Hotch wont notice you missing on the next case when you can’t answer the call.”

Reid looked up at their aforementioned boss. From his vantage point he saw the all too familiar sight of the older man hunched over a stack of papers. Hotch would definitely notice if he missed a call but that was very unlikely to happen seeing as he was almost always with Hotch when the calls came.

The two agents had been seeing each other for a while now, long enough that they were settled and comfortable in their routine - a routine which involved keeping things hidden from the team. Both of them could feel the pressure as they moved closer and closer to revealing themselves, but they had yet to come clean. They wanted to bask in their own private world a bit longer, hesitant to pop the bubble and taint what they had with the consequences of the BAU getting involved. 

As if he could feel Reid’s eyes on him, Hotch sat up straight and grabbed his phone. Reid watched him type something out before his own phone buzzed seconds later. The broken device whined again but the screen remained a pixelated mess. He swiveled his chair so that his back was to Emily and pulled out a second phone.

This phone worked perfectly fine. It had been issued to him by the FBI and majority of the time only received unfortunate news. The broken phone was personal and did not receive unfortunate news. In fact it was likely receiving something much more fun and inciting to read than the reports on his desk, but not a word of it was showing up. If Reid had to choose which phone had to be broken he'd probably rather his work phone, though he knew it might not be the most responsible choice.

He pulled up Hotch’s number on his work phone and typed out a quick message telling his partner that his phone was broken. Hotch replied instantly with a “:(” If the team knew how many emoticons Hotch used in his day-to-day texting they would probably be shocked.

Then again they’d be shocked at a lot of the things Hotch texted to that phone.

“I’m pretty sure Garcia isn’t doing anything right now.” Emily said out loud to the room having turned her attention back to her computer, giving her seemingly embarrassed coworker some space. He considered he should get it fixed. Besides, now that Emily thought his phone was broken she might get suspicious if he had to use the working one in front of her.

But he definitely wasn’t going anywhere near Garcia. To willingly hand over such sensitive intel to the nosiest and most capable snoop was a guaranteed scandal. He made a show of sighing as he stood up and made his way out the glass doors, hoping Emily would give him and his embarrassment some space. Hoping she wasn't looking he took a right instead of a left at the elevators, careful to avoid any of his coworkers on the way and trying not to look suspicious.

He approached the IT department unsure of what to ask for. Everyone always went to Garcia when they needed something and it was very rare that the computer tech had to outsource a problem. The last time Reid had spoken with anyone from IT was when they set up a computer at his desk while he was away on a consult. When he came back he was not only dismayed about the push into the 21st century but he immediately took all his frustration out on the woman who had been waiting to show him how to use it. Certainly not one of his finest moments, but after spending all day being needled by a serial killer he was in no mood to have “the cloud” explained to him.

He hesitated at the door, but his phone buzzed again. Aaron was probably texting it more to tease him. He decided his curiosity was too strong to let this problem exist any longer. He pushed through hoping desperately he didn’t see the woman he had unintentionally bullied months previously.

Sitting at a desk right behind the door was the woman he had unintentionally bullied months previously. A mousy looking woman with wild brown curls wrapped into a bun on top of her head sat hunched over a keyboard, glaring at it as if she too thought she could intimidate electronics. Surveying her narrowed eyes and intense scowl Reid thought maybe she could. Her fingers, barely poking out of her extra large sweater, darted out to hit the keys with a force even Reid knew was unnecessary for such simple technology. She stopped her assault on the keys when the door opened. As she sat up her expression briefly snapped into one of surprise and then the scowl was back - she obviously remembered Spencer.

“What did you break?” She sunk back into the chair and crossed her arms.

“Hi, hello.” Reid cleared his throat trying to sound normal. “I guess you remember me?”

“Let me guess, you spilled coffee on your keyboard?” 

Reid tried to remember her name but couldn’t, an unusual predicament for someone known for remembering everything. He glanced down at her nameplate before starting again.

“Look, uh, Nadia, first I just want to apologize-” he started.

“This isn’t my desk.”

Reid looked confused before realizing that meant she wasn’t Nadia. He cleared his throat. “Oh.”

Her arms remained crossed but she did soften a bit, taking pity at his awkwardness. “What do you need?”

He held up his phone. It buzzed again, a reminder of the trapped messages. “I can’t see anything.”

She took the phone and glanced at the screen. “Yeah you have some dead pixels. It’ll be easier just to transfer all your data to a new phone rather than try to fix it. This thing is so old anyway you could use an update.”

He looked at her with a blank stare.

“I guess it shouldn’t surprise me you'd need help with that.” She rolled her eyes but kept his phone as she stood and started walking. “Follow me.”

They meandered through a maze of desks and Reid felt the urge to try apologizing again before she abandoned him in the frantic mess of wires and cords.

“I appreciate you helping me. I really am sorry about the last time we met. I had just come off a pretty terrible case- but that doesn’t give me any right to be rude and I apologize.”

She stopped to look at him and to his relief she looked accepting of his apology. “Thank you Dr. Reid. That was kind of you to admit.”

It would have been a nice moment if not for the computer lackeys that stared at them from behind the desks they stood between. Spencer cleared his throat and they started walking again, the specialists returning to poking and prodding at devices.

They eventually reached an office in the back that looked like a much cozier and more modest version of Garcia’s. Several monitors hung on the walls most of them flashing black backgrounds and green text. The ones that weren’t being used displayed screensavers with various pictures of cats. Instead of Garcia’s bright toys and sparkly pens there were plants in need of watering and a few figurines and models. Reid definitely recognized a few of them but was reluctant to point it out. Wanting this interaction to be over was enough to stop even him from rambling.

“It’s Lucy, by the way.” She offered as she sat in the chair. There was no other seat so Spencer just hovered awkwardly, towering over the shorter woman from behind her low seat. She slid off her shoes and pulled her legs up to sit cross legged in the chair. Spencer was almost too distracted by her frank casualness to accept the peace offering, but caught on just in time.

“Lucy. Right. Sorry. I’m Spencer, but you know that.” He mumbled.

To his surprise she giggled. “Okay, Spencer.”

What even was happening? He frowned at the feeling that he had just offered her something. She wrenched open a drawer to her right and rifled through a very disorganized collection of phones and tablets until she found a phone that looked similar to his own if not slightly updated.

“I have a bunch of these. I can transfer it over right here if that’s ok with you?”

“Sure I guess. Does it take long?”

“Not at all.” She pulled a chip out from his phone and stuck it into a slot on her computer. Reid didn’t know what she was doing but felt a pang of nerves as the computer downloaded his information. There was a reason he was so reluctant to seek help for this phone. He did not need the FBI finding any of these texts. The screen just showed a shuffling list of numbers and folders and he tried to be optimistic as the bar on the screen started filling up.

“Why didn’t you go to your team’s special techie?” 

The way she said it made Reid feel defensive for his friend. She was clearly jealous, but of what Reid didn’t know. “I didn’t want to bother her with something so trivial. She’s working on some important stuff for the team.”

“Right. Why bother her with something so trivial?” Lucy turned back to the screen, her previous mood threatening to return. Reid had clearly said something wrong.

“I’m glad that you’re here to help though. I’m sure the whole office would grind to a halt if they couldn’t use their phones.” Reid backtracked. He considered himself exempt from such a fate but knew better than to remind her.

She smiled at him, his words having the desired effect. “Thanks Spencer. You know, when they installed the new computers on the 6th floor I volunteered to stay late to put yours in before you got back from your trip.”

Reid didn’t know why she’d bring up the last time they’d interacted when she was so clearly unhappy with it. He noticed the screen had stopped processing. “Is it done?”

“Oh, yeah looks like it. Just got to transfer it to the new one.” She plugged the working phone into the computer by way of a long cord that she pulled from a tangle of colorful, loose wires. As she weaved them apart she spoke over her shoulder. “You know, I’d be happy to go through the basics of the computer with you again. Since our last lesson didn’t go so well. I can stay late anytime, I’m always available.”

Before she could turn to bat her eyelashes at him he was dismissing her. “I think thats a lost cause. Besides I still barely use it. I don’t really need much technology it really just slows someone like me down.”

Once again the scowl was back. Reid could slap himself. Why couldn’t he just shut up and say thank you and get his phone back? She turned back to the computer, blocking the screen from his view. He could hear her furiously typing away and hoped that didn’t mean anything.

“So why do you even need your phone fixed then, if you’re too good for technology?”

“I didn’t say I was too good, I just-” Reid tried and figured he’d just cut his losses. He'd had conversations with serial killers that went better than this was going. “I need to be available at all times and it’s important that I don’t miss any texts from my boss. So if I could just get the phone back...”

When the phone finished downloading and buzzed she ripped it from its cord and held it out towards Reid She was clearly done with any attempts at pleasantries.

“Than you Lucy.”

“You’re welcome Dr. Reid. I trust you can find your way out.”

He wasn’t entirely sure he could but he knew better than to ask her for any more favors. Instead he just pocketed his phone and escaped her office, leaving her entrenched in the blue light of whatever was on her screen.


	3. Text Interlude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Texts are non-chronological - just some topical excerpts.

A: That officer was flirting with you earlier.

S: Which one?

A: The one who mentioned the coffee shop around the corner three times.

S: I like coffee.

A: Do you offer to buy someone coffee just because you notice they like coffee?

S: I thought that's why you always bought me coffee?

A: I thought by now you'd have realized I had an ulterior motive.

S: All of that was flirting?

A: Not all. Just most of it.

S: Well then I think we're fine.

A: How so?

S: If we base this on prior data she'll have to buy me coffee for about a year before I finally notice and do anything about it.

A: It will not be getting that far.

S: What are you going to do about it?

A: I am on my way back to the station. With coffee.

S: :D


	4. The Email

THREE MONTHS LATER

Morgan walked in the office on Monday refreshed from the first proper weekend they had in a while. He made his usual morning pit stop to Garcia’s lair and frowned when he found it empty. He supposed that wasn’t too unusual. He couldn’t begrudge anyone a late Monday morning. It was only 10 after. He’d hear her on her way in as she passed his office and would have fun giving her a little sass about it.

At 20 after when there was still no sign of the bubbly analyst he abandoned his post and made his way into the bullpen to grab some coffee. Upon hearing the sounds of laughter emanating from behind the glass doors he realized Garcia wasn’t late at all.

Garcia’s tell tale giggle grew louder as he made his entrance. She was posted at Prentiss’ desk excitedly pointing at something on the screen while Emily, JJ, and a few other agents from the office peered over her shoulder. It was mostly women gathered - which was just another reason Morgan was keen to go investigate. 

“No way this can’t be real.”

“Of course it is. Who would go through the trouble making all this up?”

As Morgan approached some of the observers made room for him, giggling as they walked back to their seats and pulled out their phones. The way they all eagerly pulled up their screens and showed it to those around them told him that whatever Garcia was looking at wasn’t exclusive to Prentiss’ computer.

“Babygirl, you wanna tell me what has the office all excited this morning?”

Garcia looked at her man but couldn’t quite talk yet, her eyes wide as she pointed at the screen, leaving smug marks despite Emily’s protests.

“Easy Garcia, I don’t come in and finger your screens!”

This outburst from Prentiss made Garcia cackle, but she did pull a bright colored piece of cloth from her pocket and wipe a smudge off the monitor. “This is absolutely, unbelievably, crazy insane! I mean who would have ever thought that something like this was happening right under our noses?!”

“Does someone wanna fill me in on whats got all the ladies in the office all fired up?”

“You mean besides this chiseled chocolate champion who finally decided to grace the bullpen with his presence?” Garcia winked at him.

“Now that’s more like it.” Derek grinned. “But I’m still missing something.”

“Check your email.” JJ said, throwing him a bone. Garcia had already turned her attention back to the screen. For something to be distracting enough for Garcia to take her eyes off him so quickly it must be big. He pulled up his phone and scrolled down to an email he had ignored earlier - a mass email from an unknown sender that he had assumed was spam. It had a website as the subject line. He raised an eyebrow at Emily who was the only one not fully submerged in a device.

“Don’t worry it’s not a virus.” She said. “Or if it is Garcia’s too distracted to notice.”

“Oh my _God._ ” JJ pointed to something else on the screen. She was practically blushing.

Eager to discover what had captured his friends interest he clicked the link. A pretty rudimentary website popped up. A chat between two people, a log of some texts, with a list of dates along the side. Morgan clicked one and it jumped back to that date in the text. It was a substantially long conversation. Finding the earliest date he could Morgan clicked on a link to over a year ago. Confused he just scrolled trough the anonymous conversation, wondering what about it had everyone's attention.

“What is this? He asked. The first few messages seemed pretty bland. The numbers weren’t labeled and so far it didn’t say any names.

“Secrets!” Garcia squealed. He looked over her shoulder. She was considerably farther down on her screen. He wondered how long she’d been reading. Seemingly a while if she had started from the beginning.

“We don’t know yet.” Prentiss said. “It was emailed to the whole office this morning. We’ve been reading for the past 20 minutes but so far theres no personal details or anything that suggests who these people are.”

“So it’s just a chat conversation between two strangers? Whats the big deal?”

“ _If the FBI knew how badly I want to bend you over my desk and make you come all over these reports maybe they’d stop asking me to do them._ ” Garcia read in a tantalizing voice. Her attempt to stifle her own laughter muted the effect. Behind her Anderson choked on his coffee, having just walked in and clearly not yet caught up on the office gossip. Prentiss gave him an apologetic look and told him to check his email but it didn’t seem to assuage his confusion.

“So these are dirty texts?” Morgan asked. Nearby some agents snickered. The whole office was clearly becoming aware of what the commotion was about and Morgan could bet none of the computers in the room had official bureau work being done on them.

“Oh sugar these are _very_ dirty texts.” Garcia was scrolling fast, looking for the most scandalous things she could find. 

“They put you and Garcia to shame.” Emily concurred.

Morgan frowned. The idea of someone leaking secrets, however hilarious the girls found them, didn’t sit right with him. Sure he was openly flirty and toed the line a bit but if his own playbook and sexting history were emailed to the entire FBI, well... he might be a bit embarrassed. 

JJ had pulled up the conversation on her own phone and was smiling to herself. “Aw, some of these are sweet.”

Morgan’s curiosity overruled his objections and concern. He scrolled through the chat again and stopped at a chunk of conversation.

_A: I’m really mad at you but if you need a ride to the meeting tonight I will drive you.  
A: But I am still mad._

_S: Can I hold your hand?_

_A: Yes. But I will be frowning._

_S: I’ve gotten used to that._

_A: Still mad.  
A: But I love you._

_S: I am sorry and I love you too._

This wasn’t just sexting, Morgan realized. This was a relationship. A full blown love affair between two agents in the bureau.

“Who do you think this is?” Prentiss asked, beating Morgan to it.

“Do you think it’s someone from this office?” Garcia wondered. “Wait what am I saying? I can figure this out. I’m the one who figures these things out. Technically this is exactly why the FBI pays me!”

Garcia looked like she had just been tasked with the most important assignment she’d ever gotten. Morgan almost felt bad for whoever it was. Did they know they were about to be revealed to the entire office?

“Wait, we should leave this alone.” JJ said, likely thinking along the same lines as Morgan.

“Excuse moi? You don’t want to know who these two are?!” Garcia looked scandalized.

“I just think maybe they deserve their privacy.”

“If they want privacy they shouldn’t have posted all their dirty talk online. Thats like rule number one in internet school.” Garcia said.

“I don’t think they posted it. Seems a bit weird to upload your secret relationship to the web and then send it to the entire bureau. Even the director is CC’d on this email.” Prentiss scrolled through the recipients and balked at exactly how many people now had access to this conversation.

“Where is the rest of the team?” Morgan wondered aloud noticing Reid’s empty chair for the first time. The girls looked around as well and they all glanced up at Hotch’s office which was dark and empty.

“Strange. Rossi isn’t in yet either.” JJ pointed out.

“Oh my GOD. Rossi.” Garcia loudly whispered.

“What about him?” 

“Oh hmm, I don’t know, just how do you think the man responsible for most of our fraternization rules plays into this?!”

As if on cue the senior agent waltzed into the room with no regard for his lateness or the energy in the room. He sipped an expensive coffee and nodded at the huddle as he walked towards his office.

“Well, let’s find out.” Emily said before calling out to Rossi. “Hey Romeo!”

Rossi’s eyebrows rose but still wasn’t quite hooked. He only slowed slightly on his path past them. “Are we trying out nicknames? Because as your elder I get unlimited veto power, remember that.”

“Do you also have unlimited text messaging?” Emily asked.

The question stumped Rossi. He paused his retreat but could sense a trap. “Why? Please don’t tell me you all started some sort of team group chat. I don’t think my old phone could handle any of those “moving images” Penelope would undoubtedly send.”

“It’s not him.” JJ laughed. “The last time he tried to text me he somehow sent it through his email. All his texts have his email signature on it.” 

“What’s not me?”

“Yeah it’s definitely not Rossi.” Emily agrees, mesmerized by something Garcia is pointing at on the computer. “I think it’s two men.”

“What?” Morgan glanced at Garcia. The blonde woman was wide eyed and her jaw dropped. He wasn’t sure he needed to know what the two were looking at - especially if it was between two men. He was now considerably less inclined to read through this sext log.

“Whats two men?” Rossi asked. Normally he liked to keep out of whatever drama happened around the office, preferring to judge from afar, but he had started to clue in on the buzz of excitement and couldn’t resist.

Emily laughed awkwardly, unsure of how to explain their findings. JJ was now looking at where the two were pointing and a laugh burst out of her, which she grabbed her mouth with her hand as if to catch it. Garcia was the only one with enough balls to say it out loud.

“I get so hard when I think about crawling under your desk and sucking your co-”

“Penelope!” Rossi chastised. “Don’t get me wrong, I can respect the game but it’s 9:30 in the morning!”

“It’s not me! A secret FBI couple had their texts leaked to the entire bureau. Check your email it was sent to you too.”

Rossi pulled out his phone and confirmed that he did indeed have access to this lewd conversation. Without a goodbye he made his way to his office.

“Have fun in there Rossi.” Morgan called after him with a smirk. Rossi raised his coffee mug at him, then gestured towards Hotch’s empty office. 

“You’re lucky it’s me overhearing this and not Hotch. He isn't going to find this as funny as you all do. You know he's not one to mix business and pleasure.”


	5. Text Interlude

A: What are you doing under your desk?

S: Looking for something.

A: You wanna come look under mine?

S: No? How would that help? Did you drop something?

A: No but I'm sure if you looked around you’d find something. ;)

S: Aren't you supposed to be doing something?

A: A man can dream.

S: Finish those reports and we can go home where it doesn’t have to be a dream.

A: Or I could just not do them?

S: Fair enough. You've never really cared about your job anyway.

A: If they fired me I’d fuck you over as many desks in this office as I could before they dragged us out.

S: And get me fired too?

A: You would want to go on without me?

S: You would want to take me down with you?

A: I thought I made it clear I wanted you to go down.


	6. The Eavesdropper

Hotch didn’t normally smile at work but it was just him and Spencer on the elevator and he couldn’t help himself. He basked in the sight of his lover’s wild hair that he took full responsibility for. Aware of his not-so-subtle admirer, Spencer attempted to smooth down his hair and pushed it behind his ears. In doing so he managed to completely neglect the back - which was the bulk of the problem - but Hotch had no plans on telling him.

“It’s bad enough we’re showing up late together, if you keep smiling like that you might as well be wearing a t-shirt that says ‘We stopped to make out at in the commuter parking lot.’” Reid muses. Hotch just huffed out a laugh before beginning to settle into work Hotch.

“I think the team would be so shocked to see me in a t-shirt they’d completely overlook what it says.” He said. Reid considered this and was inclined to agree. “Besides, I’m not late. I’m in a meeting with Strauss.”

“What?”

“She emailed me about it a few minutes ago. Apparently theres some sort of data breach. She’s probably just going to ask for a preliminary profile and tell me she’s borrowing Garcia.”

“Great so what do I tell them?”

“About what?”

“Why I’m late.”

“Hmmmmmm.” Hotch drew out his thought until the elevator dinged at the 6th floor. “Look at that, better get in there you’re already late.”

“Not fair.”

“Get to work Reid, I’d hate to have to fire you.” By now his demeanor was fully set in stoic boss-mode but he stole a wink before the doors closed.

Reid adjusted his bag and rushed into the BAU as if he’d actually been in a hurry to get there. To his surprise there was no need for theatrics as everyone was absorbed in their computers and phones. Even Morgan and Garcia were in the bullpen, huddled around Emily’s computer. It probably had something to do with the data breach, Reid thought. He took advantage of the distraction to go grab coffee. As a known technophobe there was no chance the breach had anything to do with him and it was unlikely anyone would ask for his help.

As he walked into the kitchen two agents sitting at the break table talking in hushed tones lowered their phones and stopped talking abruptly. Realizing it was Reid and not an authority figure they resumed their conversation. 

“I’m telling you, it’s serious stuff.” A short stocky man who Reid didn’t recognize said. He must be one of the new hires. He was talking to a taller, much more attractive woman Reid knew to be a junior analyst. He was curious as to what he was reading off his phone that would have her so rapt with attention. What was so serious? He clicked the button to start a fresh pot and listened to him regale her, reading off his phone like it was a book of poetry.

_“I swear since I’ve met you I haven’t had a single dream that you weren’t in. It makes me wish I had your memory and could recall every one of them. While we sacrifice a lot of sleep for this job the little rest I do get is better and more peaceful knowing that you’ll still be there when I open my eyes.”_

Spencer was thankful he wasn’t holding the coffee pot yet because he surely would have dropped it.

“That is so sweet.” The woman crooned at the narrator. “Isn’t it wild to think theres this beautiful, romantic soul here walking among us?”

“What if I told you it was me?” The man suggested with a smirk.

“I heard the texts were between two guys?” She countered. His cocky facade dropped immediately and he stuttered over his response.

“I know I’m just, I was just kidding, I just mean that I’m a romantic too-”

The rest of his response was drowned out by Reid frantically leaving the kitchen. His mind raced through the possibilities of what was happening. Did he hear them correctly? Maybe it was just a coincidence and his mind just substituted their words from his own memory. But the comment about the two men...

When he approached the safety of his desk he dropped his bag and gathered his thoughts. His whole body was prickly, like the instinct that someone was talking about him extended beyond the break room. He wiped his brow. Was he sweating? The team still hadn’t noticed him, they were all still looking at Emily’s computer. Spencer could see Garcia mouthing along with whatever she was reading on the computer. He wondered if they were the same words he had just heard repeated in the break room. The hair on the back of his neck remained at attention. 

Smoothing down his cardigan and swallowing a gulp of nerves he walked over. If his breathing was still off he would just blame it on rushing in late. Luckily they were all too engrossed in the screen to notice.

“Spence! Did you get the email?” JJ asked, the first to notice his arrival.

“What email?”

“Oh right, yours is probably in the actual mail. It’s going to take longer because they have to write out all the texts so you can read it long form.” Morgan laughed. 

“Whats going on?” Reid asked, not even reacting to Morgans teasing. The mention of ‘texts’, plural, set sirens off in his head.

“Theres a secret couple among us.” Emily said only a little sarcastically. She had tried to remain above it a bit, still clinging to her jaded attitude towards relationships, but she was obviously more invested than she let on.

“Here?” Reid asked, his voice threatening to betray him. “In the BAU?”

“AH!” Garcia blurted out. “Can you imagine!? We don’t know who exactly, it was sent to all of Quantico but boy do we know they are serious. There are months and months of texts and some of them are absolutely obscene-”

“How did you find them?” Reid asked cutting her off. Then his brain processed all of what she had said. “Wait - they were sent out? To all- to ALL of Quantico?”

“Yeah! Listen to this,” Garcia cleared her throat. _“I’ll finish your last three reports in exchange for a favor - which may or may not involve you getting on your knees and-”_

“Garcia!” Reid yelped, fully aware of what the rest of the text said.

“Lets keep it PG, PG. Pretty boy probably isn’t used to this kind of language.” Derek punched him in the shoulder.

“Oh right,” Emily agreed. “Some of these include some adult language. We might need to see some ID, kid.” 

She smiled at the genius as if to check that he knew she was kidding. Her smile faltered a bit when he didn’t react to the teasing at all, but remained lost in his own head. She could recognize the look of the gears in his head whirring.

He shook it off and cleared his throat like he was tamping something down. “Ha ha, at least I’m not the one going to lose my job for reading sexually explicit material at work. What did Hotch say about all this?”

He looked up at an office he knew was empty. Redirection was his specialty. Sure enough the gang started speculating on Hotch’s reaction to all this. Reid nervously tapped his fingers against his leg. If he didn’t know about this Hotch surely didn’t either and there was a good chance he was currently finding out about it from his least favorite person. Reid hoped his boss was better at hiding his surprise than he was.


	7. Text Interlude

S: How bad was it?

A: I’ve been enthusiastically offered early retirement. Again.

S: Really?

A: What do you think?

S: You wouldn’t get to see me every second of every day.

A: Then I can’t possibly take it.

S: You’re not annoyed with me by now?

A: Never.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was only planning on dropping a few chapters at first but I can't help myself! Most of this is written so I'll probably post it in big chunks each week. :)


	8. The Meeting

Hotch never sat in Strauss’s office. It wasn’t a tactic as much as a desperate hope that he wouldn’t be staying long. She sighed when he didn’t sit, having already sat herself, and just glared up at him when he didn’t reciprocate.

“I suppose you got the email.”

“Yes, that’s why I’m here.”

“Have you read any of the texts?”

“Texts?”

She looked up at him curiously before putting on her glasses and pulling up something on her phone.

“The website? Have you gotten a chance to look through it?”

“No I haven’t.” He was aware he was missing something but he wasn’t going to let her know that if he could help it.

“It appears as though two of our agents have been flagrantly breaching our fraternization policy.”

Ice shot through him. “I thought this was a data breach?”

He didn’t like not having the upper hand but he had no idea where this was going. He would have thought if she'd figured out about his relationship with Spencer she'd be giddy as she kicked him to the curb. Instead she was glaring up at him annoyed, waiting for him to catch on. 

“A website containing a year’s worth of texts between what we suspect is two male agents that work out of this building has been been sent to our entire directory.”

If she continued speaking Hotch wasn't aware of it. At the impact of her words his ears had stopped hearing anything but a deafening ringing. It was the sound of his career flatlining with one shrilly delivered sucker punch to the gut.

“Sent to the entire directory?”

Strauss looked at him with irritation and stood up. “What were you doing this morning that was more pressing than rouge agents sending out sensitive information to the entire FBI?”

“My apologies, Jack was sick last night and I thought without a pressing case I could spare the time to take him to the doctor myself this morning.” It was a desperate card to play but if there was ever a time to use it it was now. It almost worked. She relaxed her shoulders a bit and the sigh she released wasn’t entirely at his expense.

“This was just sent out this morning. I suppose it’s reasonable that you haven’t had time to properly look through it.”

“And you’re expecting me to go through the entire site?”

“I want your team to analyze these texts.”

Hotch didn’t have a response to that. Realizing it had been sent to the entire bureau there was no reason not to believe his team was already going through them. Garcia in particular could probably have announced to the whole 6th floor who they were by now. If she could pinpoint serial killers bouncing prepaid cell phones off towers across the globe she could certainly trace two phones that primarily texted just outside her office.

“Is this really worth the whole team working on? Why do we need to analyze the text?”

Strauss looked at him like she couldn’t figure out why he was being so slow and filed it away as another reason she didn’t like him. He swallowed again, hoping the feeling of his throat sinking into his stomach would go away but it just got worse. His face didn’t show it thankfully. Saying he had a good pokerface was a massive understatement. He continued to stare blankly at his unamused section chief. If he wasn't internally panicking he'd be enjoying how pissed off it was making her.

“We don’t know why this was sent out or what the purpose of it is. I want to know who they are, what their goal is, and how much damage they could do to the FBI’s image.”

“In what way would this damage the FBI’s image?”

“We don’t know who has access to this site. We don’t know what their angle is. It could be a distraction, it could be a ploy to leverage something against the FBI - there could be threats hidden among these texts for all we know.” She seemed to be gasping at straws, eager to find fault and not necessarily at the hacker.

“I doubt theres anything criminal-”

“You haven’t even read them yet Aaron.” The perturbed section chief bit out. “What about my order do you not understand?”

He needed to be careful. “You want us to profile if they have any ulterior motives.”

“And I want you to find me who these two men are so I can deal with them.” She said placing her hands flat on her desk with a sense of finality. “Have your analyst trace the phones while you put together a list of possible departments. A list of agents if you can manage would be even better. If there is anything in these texts that sounds like there is a something bigger at play here I want to know about it. And fast.”

She sat down at her desk in a clear sign of dismissal. Hotch couldn't leave fast enough.


	9. Text Interlude

S: This is insane, right? 

A: How did someone get access to our phones? 

S: Do you think someone is targeting us? 

A: I don't see why or what this would accomplish.

S: Me dying of embarrassment?


	10. The Round Table

“It’s updating in real time!”

At Garcia’s outburst Reid quickly shoved his phone into his bag and feigned surprise. “What are they saying?”

“They found out their phones have been hacked and are wondering if someone is targeting them.”

“I feel bad for them.” JJ said. She did not, however, stop scrolling through the backlog of secrets.

Hotch entered the room and did not look surprised to find his agents huddled around the website. “Conference room.” He announced without any greeting. He looked at Reid and even in just a split seconds glance the latter could tell he was rattled. Reid shuttered. He decided to take another attempt at getting coffee and would grab one for Hotch. At this point it couldn't hurt.

He rejoined the team at the round table just as Hotch looked up and barked “Where’s Reid?”. At the sight of his agent holding two coffees he softened his glare and accepted one. Realizing he’d been overcompensating he nodded an apology at Reid who fully understood. They’d both been dumped unceremoniously outside their comfort zone and were unsure what the outcome would be. It was stressful to say the least.

“I can correctly assume you’ve all seen the website?” The team looked sheepishly at each other despite the fact that it had been personally emailed to them and they were not in trouble. 

“Strauss wants us to go through it.” Morgan said. Hotch whipped his head to look at him, an unusual move for the traditionally calm, collected leader. “She just emailed us about it. Says to report directly to her if we find anything.”

There were a lot of reasons Hotch hated Erin Strauss and he added this to the list. He had already been struggling to figure out how to not comply with her order while circumventing his moralistic commitment to the job. He should have known she would micromanage this. It’s possible he isn’t on his A game today.

“Yes. She wants us to go through these texts to be sure there is no malicious intent in sending these conversations to the entire bureau.”

“Sir I’ve already been through a lot of these texts and so far nothing reads as dangerous. Just a lot of really juicy - and if I may be so bold sexy - exchanges between two men who seem to love each other.” Garcia offered. 

It was unusual enough that the words “juicy” and “sexy” were being used at the round table but having his subordinate tell him directly to his face that she had been reading all of his most private messages was a bit much for Hotch. When he didn’t respond right away Reid stepped up.

“And they obviously didn’t want to send it to everyone. So wouldn’t any blame be on whoever uploaded the site?” He offered.

Hotch cleared his throat and thought carefully about his words. “Yes, which is why I don’t want us to focus on who these men are. If there is a reason behind this it is more likely that someone is using it as a distraction or shock value. Garcia, can you focus on the web address and tracking down who uploaded the texts?”

“Of course sir. But you know I could just as easily trace the phones while I’m doing that. I have more than one computer...”

“That isn’t necessary just yet.”

“Wouldn’t knowing who these people are help us create a suspect pool? Whoever is doing this likely has an emotional investment in this couple or is centering the distraction around them for a reason.” Morgan asked. 

Hotch didn’t have a response to that either, to which Reid stepped up again.

“It doesn’t look like your traditional texting application that comes with most phones, if they’re using a third party extension wouldn’t it be harder to trace?”

The whole table looked at Reid who shrugged at their bewildered faces.

“Contrary to popular belief I do know some things about technology. I just choose not to use it if I don’t have to.”

“Oh honey that’s cute but if you think theres an app out there I can’t hack you are the stupidest genius I’ve ever met.” Garcia smiled at him, but it was not well received. Reid’s throat was suddenly dry as he recognized the truth in what she was saying. At this point their only hope was that the power for the whole building went out, the generators were all dead, and Garcia happened to forget to charge all of her laptops. And even if all that happened all anyone had to do was call one of the numbers. Reid made a mental note to turn off the vibration as soon as he got a chance.

“Alright then Garcia get to work while we start a preliminary analysis.” Garcia flew out of the room eager to get started. Hotch ignored the worried look Reid briefly flashed at him. He opened the site for the first time and realized just how far back it went. He forced himself to continue and give the orders that went against every private, embarrassed bone in his body. “Okay then, everyone take a month and make note of anything that suggests theres a something bigger going on here.”

“You don’t really think theres something these two men are hiding that’s worth exposing to the entire FBI?” Rossi eyed his friend with a careful regard.

“Honestly, no but Strauss seems to think this is just the beginning.” Hotch clenched his jaw as he realized that she may be right. While he and Spencer weren’t planning anything whoever was exposing them could certainly have an ulterior motive.

“Alright, I’ll start at the beginning.” Rossi offered. He pulled up the site on his tablet and started scrolling up, oblivious to the link that would take him there.

“I’ll start in February. Wanna bet these two spend the 14th writing each other poems and sending mushy declarations of love?” JJ pulled up her phone and kept reading, clearly picking up right where she left off.

“Okay so Emily start in May and Reid-”

“I want to start in October.” Hotch raised an eyebrow and Reid looked at him pointedly. Both of their birthdays fell between October and November and he knew the bulk of their most scandalous texts were the two of them talking about how they were going to celebrate in the weeks leading up to them. “What? I just like the fall.”

“Alright then Hotch, you want summer or the Holidays?” Morgan asked. Hotch weighed his options and decided a colorful - and only partly facetious - discussion about him renting a Santa suit was one he’d rather keep private. “I’ll take winter you can do summer.”

“Wait- are there any pictures?” Reid asked, remembering a few spicy conversations after their trip to the beach that involved tan lines. “I mean, doesn’t sexting usually lead to... you know...”

“Do you know pretty boy?” Morgan teased.

“I haven’t seen any pictures yet.” Emily said. “Maybe the website doesn’t support it.”

“Let’s hope so.” Hotch grumbled under his breath a little too loudly. When he looked back up to see everyone staring at him he cleared his throat. “Our team doesn’t need to spend the day profiling dick pics.”

At Hotch’s use of the phrase “dick pics” the table erupted into hysterics. Morgan in particular let out a burst of laughter that followed Hotch out of the room as he left, heading towards Garcia’s office to attempt some damage control.


	11. Text Interlude

S: Can we go somewhere?

A: Where do you want to go?

S: Anywhere.

A: By that logic aren’t you already there?

S: Somewhere just the two of us.

A: I’d like that.

S: It could be a closet for all I care. Just as long as all these people aren’t there with us.  
S: Perhaps a closet isn’t the best example.

A: So no closets?

S: No a closet is fine for now.

A: Should this be an in person conversation?

S: Say you’ll take me somewhere thats not a closet one day and I will wait patiently for that day with no reservations.

A: I will take you where ever you want to go the second you feel like going.

S: Really?

A: Yes. Unless it’s right now because I’m late for a meeting.

S: And because it’s scary and would change everything and likely ruin our careers?

A: This should be an in person conversation.

S: It will be, but for right now I’d rather think about what we’d be doing in an actual closet.

A: How big is the closet? Do we have to stand really close together to fit inside?

S: Don’t ask me about the physics of this, but the closet is somehow tall enough that I can fully stand but not tall enough that you can. Your side of the closet has a very low clearance actually. I think you’ll have to be on your knees.

A: New plan, if we find that particular closet we are allowed to stay in there for as long as we like.

S: Deal.


	12. The Request

Hotch beelined for Garcia’s office. The blonde had only just arrived having grabbed a fresh coffee on her way back to her domain. Unaware of her guest she placed her coffee down and settled into her chair. Breathing in deep she shook the morning off of her and cracked her knuckles before swiping a finger over her track pad and watching all her monitors flicker to life. Hotch felt bad interrupting a morning ritual but this was important.

“Garcia.”

It was good she wasn’t holding her coffee anymore. She jumped at his voice. “Okay I’m good but I’m not that good. I just sat down.”

“I know, I just wanted to clarify something.” Hotch looked nervous. Garcia didn’t think she’d ever seen him nervous in all the years she had worked under him. She turned her chair to give him her full attention.

“Sir?”

“Strauss is asking us to narrow down who these men are. I’m aware that you’re likely to be first to do so and I just-” Hotch considered how much he was willing to divulge. “I ask that you come to me with any findings before telling anyone else.”

“Of course sir. Can I ask why?”

He figured he could stand to be a little honest. “After my meeting with Strauss I’m concerned that her insistence on outing this couple is more focused on stopping them than stopping any hacker. Until I know her intentions I’d like to keep this between us. I’d rather not send an agent to the slaughter if I can help it.”

“Oh, sir.” Garcia looked up with an expression that Hotch knew meant she’d hug him if he didn’t set such uptight boundaries. “Even though I’ve only read some of their texts I feel like I know these guys and I trust them. I’m glad you do too. No one deserves to be forcibly outed, especially when it could cost them their jobs.”

“Right. So if Strauss comes by-”

“There is a third party encryption on the application they used to send these messages and I’m sorry ma’am but hacking into Google takes time.”

Hotch looked at Garcia with an expression that said he’d have hugged her back.

“Thank you Garcia. I need to take care of something, if the team asks do you mind telling them I’m in a meeting?”

“Your wish is my command.”

Hotch left Garcia to her screens and the intrigued analyst picked her coffee back up, wistfully taking a sip as she tried to put together the pieces.

“Curiouser and curiouser.” She said to the bobblehead closest to her main monitor.

It nodded in agreement.


	13. Text Interlude

A: There is a strong possibility that we have a four day weekend this week.

S: Really?

A: And by strong possibility I mean I already bought us plane tickets.

S: Where are we going?  
S: Are you sure you’re up for it? You worked all last weekend and I know you haven’t been sleeping.

A: Yes, but I also know you haven’t seen your mom in a while.

S: Really?!?!!! 

A: I can sleep on the plane.

S: She’ll be so excited!!! I can’t believe you’d sacrifice a four day weekend like that.

A: It’s not a sacrifice. I get to meet your mother and maybe get a tan.

S: You’re getting a sunburn for sure.

A: Just promise to roll me over when I fall asleep so I get an even burn.

S: You are the most thoughtful man I’ve ever met and I don’t deserve you.

S: But I’m not rolling you over. It will be more fun to draw in sunscreen on your back.

A: Will you at least promise me you wont draw a dick on my back?

S: Why would I do that?

A: Forget I mentioned it.

S: I literally can’t.

A: I immediately regret this.

S: Too late. Do you think you could send me a picture for reference? I need to study up so I draw it correctly.

A: I am not encouraging this.

S: Unrelated question: Do you think you could tell the difference between me putting sunscreen on your back or me coming on your back?

A: I can’t wait to meet your mother and tell her what a charming young man you turned out to be.

S: I forgot this conversation was about my mother!!  
S: :O


	14. The Profile

Back in the conference room the team silently read their assigned excerpts, the only interruption being an occasional snort or giggle from someone as they came across something particularly raunchy. Spencer was squirming in his seat, still widely uncomfortable with his teammates reading in depth about his love life. He resisted the urge to text Hotch knowing it would just appear on the website. He wondered where he had gone.

“You know kid, you could just read all these at your genius pace and we’d be done a lot sooner.” Rossi said.

“I could.” Reid replied, desperately wishing that had been an option. Little did they know he didn’t even need to read them, considering he knew everything that was on that site word for word.

“I think they worked together for a while before they started sleeping together.” Emily said from behind her laptop.

“What makes you say that?”

“Listen: _‘I used to stare at you all the time and I thought for sure you knew.’ ‘I didn’t, but if I had noticed I’d have been flattered that someone as young and pretty as you even thought about looking.’_ ” Emily read.

“Yeah I’ve got something similar.” JJ added. “ _’I wish I had woken up sooner. I wish it didn’t take me so long to realize.’ ‘But you did eventually and that’s better than nothing, right?’ ‘Right, but that wont stop me from trying to make up for lost time.’_ ”

The table fell silent as JJ finished quoting them. Morgan even dropped his cocky demeanor at the weight of their words. “Man these guys are really in love, huh?”

Reid could recall where each of those conversations took place. He remembers earlier in the relationship when he texted Hotch while staring up at his office, shocked when his boss turned and smiled at him, not caring that it was the middle of the day and someone might see. He hoped no one saw how red the response made him, that someone had called him pretty. He could remember staring at Hotch from across the jet and wondering what had him so contemplative, only to receive a text and it was his turn to risk a smile as they both silently promised to continue making up for lost time as soon as they got home that night. 

“What if they aren’t in love?” 

The team shook off their wistfulness to raise eyebrows at their young genius. Lying wildly wasn’t the best tactic but Reid had a lot to lose and the window for doing something was closing fast.

“How can you say that? If this were the 17th century they’d be dedicating sonnets to each other.” Emily said. “Do you need to hear another one? There’s some sappy crap earlier this month hang on-”

“No I mean what if they used to be but one is doing this in spite of the other. What if it’s just a lover’s quarrel they decided to make public?”

“I dunno that’s a pretty big risk for one of them to take just to get back at the other. They both have their jobs on the line.”

“Provided these are even really agents?” Reid tried. “What if it’s all a fantasy made up by some technologically inclined wannabes?”

“Kid, I hate to say it but I don’t think you’re on top of your game today. Have you had enough coffee?” asked Rossi.

“He’s right man. You can’t fake this kind of intimacy. And they definitely read like agents. Or at least someone whose around agents constantly.”

“Okay so why don’t we expand our suspect pool to include analysts or tactical teams?”

“Spence, we’re supposed to be narrowing our list not expanding it.”

“Besides based on their schedules and the fact that they seem to be together 24/7 I think it’s safe to say they are on the same team. Theres no indication it’s interdepartmental.”

“I think one of them is the team leader though.”

Reid tried not to sound alarmed when he addressed her. “What makes you say that?”

“I don’t have any direct proof, but theres definitely some sort of power dynamic here." she muses.

"I think one of them is older and has more experience with relationships but the other is more confident sexually. Or at least more direct about it.” Emily adds.

Reid is shocked at how accurate that assessment is, but then again all his innermost thoughts have been spread out like a buffet in front of the best profilers in the FBI so he supposed he shouldn’t be that surprised. 

“You don’t say?”


	15. Text Interlude

S: Do you think anyone suspects?

A: If they have no one has said anything.

S: Do you think they would?

A: I think the idea of us is so far out of left field that they wouldn't jump to conclusions.

S: I don't know what a field has to do with it but we are very careful.

A: They would sooner believe you were a pro baseball player before they would believe we were dating.

S: I am not a pro baseball player.

A: I bet you'd look good in a uniform though.

S: I'm still not sure why we are talking about baseball but noted.


	16. The Ambulance

Hotch ignored the phone buzzing in his pocket and kept walking down a hallway on the top floor of the FBI headquarters. The hallways were bigger and more daunting up here, like they were made to be graced by more important people. His footsteps echoed intimidatingly as he marched past a line up of portraits and plaques of men who had served the FBI in the bravest and most honorable ways. It was a safe bet none bet none of them had ever slept with their subordinates.

There was a time when Hotch would have liked to be on these walls one day, or at the very least have an office on a higher floor. A time when climbing the ladder was the most important thing for his family, logic that looking back didn’t make sense to him. It was an idea that stemmed from expectations and his wife’s influence, and because of this he had held on to it even after he subconsciously stopped working towards it. That was a guilt he had spent time learning to live with and would continue doing so, but it helped that he had finally forgiven himself for discovering where he really wanted to be. Not that there was anything wrong with wanting to be promoted of course, but Hotch had been pointedly offered retirement too many times to think anyone wanted him moving up the ladder.

This walk held a certain sense of finality and the idea of saying goodbye was a foreign feeling in the pit of his stomach. While he had wrestled with leaving the BAU before being forced to leave it now after all that he had been through and all he had given of himself was going to hurt. But he had accepted that possibility the first time he had kissed Spencer.

***

It was always going to be in an ambulance. Hotch knew how stupid it was to leave his heart with someone that attracted so many bullets but by then he had no choice. It had been long after he had realized his feelings for Reid. For months he had watched his youngest agent with curiosity, looking out his window so much he considered rearranging his office. He’d started texting him more, making sure Spencer knew he could talk to him outside of work. He started asking Spencer educational questions for Jack, excited when his son had a new interest he could run by Spencer. He would only ever go out with the team if Spencer was going. He would offer him rides home when it was raining.

After a week of desperately hoping for rain it hit him like a shot to the head.

Head wounds bleed a lot. He knew this without Spencer having to tell him, but the genius did so anyway several times. Hotch hoped it was shock that had him repeating himself and not the bullet wound that had grazed the side of his skull, just barely missing his ear. Hotch held both his hands on each side of the Spencer’s face as he knelt over him, trusting the rest of the team to secure the unsub. Spencer had made the shot and as both of them fell Hotch had ran at Spencer no hesitation. He registered the sound of a gun being kicked aside and the grunts of pain from the killer and that satisfied him enough to turn all his energy towards the fallen agent. Blood dripped through Hotch’s fingers and he could feel the sticky substance mixing with Spencer’s hair, a bloody nest under the pressure of his large palms.

“Don’t squeeze please.” Spencer said it as he closed his eyes but a smile appeared on his lips.

“Hotch! You’re hurting him!” JJ’s voice sounded so far away he barely registered her presence, but he was loathe to prove her right. He dropped his right hand and kept the other against the wound, cradling his agent’s head like he was plugging a hole Spencer’s brain threatened to leak out of. The way Spencer calmly leaned into Hotch’s hand and opened his eyes again assured him this wasn’t true. 

“He’s not hurting me. The head wound is hurting me.” He said, his voice only getting slightly smaller. He was acting far too calm considering, but shock presents itself in many ways Hotch supposed. His eyes were looking off towards where he assumed JJ was and Hotch fought a surge of jealousy that threatened to physically turn Spencer’s head towards him. It wouldn’t be hard. His hand was already there and the man was weak from blood loss.

The EMTs arrived and Hotch relinquished control of Spencer’s head. He immediately missed it. If the only time he got to hold him like that was on the floor of a warehouse covered in blood he would take it, and he wasn’t going to dwell on how morbid that was. He didn’t remember climbing in the ambulance but if there was any resistance he wouldn’t have listened anyway. The next thing he knew he was being handed wipes to clean the blood off his hands as another man with gloves and proper training put his hands in Spencer’s hair. The jealousy was back.

“I think it’s superficial. I don’t feel like my skull is fractured.” Spencer sounded sleepy but coherent, which is too close to how Hotch imagined Spencer sounded in the mornings and he wondered why he couldn’t stop romanticizing this terrible ordeal. “I might need stitches.”

“You might, huh?” The EMT wrapping Spencer’s head looked at the other with raised eyebrows but otherwise was smiling. “Maybe one or two.”

If they are being so casual then they aren’t worried and he’s fine. Hotch thought and suddenly he could afford to breathe again. He let out some air and started to clean the blood from his hands, no longer frozen but still anxious. There was more too it than the injury though. Even realizing Spencer was probably going to be okay didn’t assuage the knots in his stomach or how lightheaded he felt. At his movement, Spencer looked up to find Hotch and smiled when he met his eye.

They just looked at each other, both smiling and looking like idiots. The EMT didn’t mind that Spencer was holding his head up, it made wrapping his head easier. Spencer blinked and chewed his lip as he pondered the wild looking, blood soaked man who followed him into the ambulance and suddenly Hotch just _knows_. Everything he’s been processing for the past however long about his feelings and what Spencer means to him was solidified - and Hotch was well and truly fucked. He was tethered to this and whatever the consequences were he was going to have to deal with them.

The other EMT, oblivious to whats happening between the two men, prepared something off to the side before turning to the injured agent. “How bad is the pain right now?”

“No narcotics.”

Hotch and Spencer spoke in unison. For Hotch it’s an order that he doesn’t even think about and expects to be followed. For Spencer its a plea that he wishes he didn’t have to utter. Spencer didn’t break eye contact with his boss. Hotch had said it too and everyone followed Hotch’s orders. The EMT didn’t even question it.

Hotch closed his eyes for a minute, almost as if to ground himself. As soon as he did he panicked that he had just let a dream escape, but when he opened his eyes Spencer was still looking at him like that, eyes a little watery and contemplation still on his brow. Hotch recognized the activity behind his eyes and wondered, hoped even, that even a whisper of the multitude of thoughts that constantly occupied Spencer's brain were about him. The beautiful, bleeding genius closed his eyes and Hotch recognized a breath of action, the kind you take before doing something risky.

“I’d be in your ambulance, you know.”

At his confession Hotch is gone because _Spencer knows too_ and the idea that what he was feeling was mutual is almost too much for him. Suddenly it’d been hours since his last breath but that didn’t matter. The EMTs probably had oxygen. Hotch remained a statue and just sat in the moment, unsure of how to process a feeling so foreign to him. Spencer opened his eyes and Hotch was shocked to see his face full of worry. _What was there to be worried about?_ He ironically thought while sitting in the back of an ambulance.

“You want me to get shot next?” He managed to blurt out, but now it was his voice that sounded miles away.

Spencer laughed. The kind of laughter fueled by nerves coupled with the kind of mania that comes from being unwittingly controlled by emotions. He slid his hands over a stomach that was presumably in knots. Hotch knew what that felt like. It hit him that he and Spencer were sharing those nerves, but he still questioned why. _This was a good thing. It had to be to feel like this_. He smiled at Spencer reassuringly, the muscles of his face working overtime as they’ve rarely smiled like this. 

At that notion Hotch’s brain turned on again. Of course Spencer was nervous. How could he possibly know how Hotch felt? He had traveled this whole emotional journey behind his usual stoic facade that wasn’t allowed to show more than three expressions - and two of those expressions involved frowning. He nearly joined Spencer in laughter as he realized that after all this he hadn’t even begun to admit anything out loud. 

Spencer let his head droop back, lightheaded from the laughter and blood loss. These EMTs must think they're insane. At least he was more comfortable now that one of them had gotten a pillow to prop him up a bit. He could still see Hotch if he turned his head slightly to the side and he did so, surveying Hotch’s face for any sign of what came next. Hotch certainly had no idea, but he willed himself not to hide behind a mask anymore. Whatever happened next had to be completely honest. His face softened but he didn’t start talking.

“Hotch-” 

Spencer was interrupted by Hotch moving. Apparently he did know what to do next. The EMT between him and Spencer was busy turned towards the monitor recording Spencer’s vitals which was good, for if he hadn’t been he’d have been knocked over as Hotch moved towards Spencer with a determined force he typically reserved for out in the field.

Either knowing what was coming or desperately hoping so, Spencer rose up to meet him. The first of them that met was Hotch’s hands reaching to hold the sides of Spencer’s face - below the ears, careful to avoid any bandages, and sure not to squeeze. At his touch Spencer’s hopes were confirmed and he had just started to smile when their lips met.

Hotch was bent over awkwardly, definitely elbowing one of the EMTs and he was sure he was getting blood all over Spencer’s neck, but there was not a force in the world that that could have prevented that kiss. The ambulance came to a stop, the motion pulling him forward and threatening to send him falling on top of Spencer, but even that couldn’t stop him. He just kissed him harder and Spencer responded just as eagerly.

Hotch would never have guessed that he’d ever have to be pried apart from another man by EMTs in the back of an ambulance but yet, there they were. Hotch bashfully sat back down as the doors opened and the light that entered illuminated Spencer in a perfect rectangular beam of light. It framed him like it knew he was worthy of a portrait. He was glowing, freshly kissed and blinking in disbelief. Hotch had never seen something so beautiful, even as Spencer began laughing wildly, almost manic, covered in blood. His hair stuck out of the bandage in disarray and his shirt and tie were wrinkled and crumpled but the way the light bounced off his hazel eyes was transcendent. Hotch joined him in laughter, the both of them giving themselves over to the bubbling emotion that had been longing to escape. 

That image was seared into his brain forever and when he looked back on it now it felt like a movie he had watched, because that couldn’t have possibly happened to him. It was almost too unbelievable despite every fiber of his being remembering what it was like to be in that ambulance and the reminder every day as he kissed Spencer good morning. _This was real._

Over a year had passed from that moment to this one and their feelings for each other had well since solidified. Their nervous emotions grew into confident and stable promises to each other and neither had ever had to doubt the others intentions. From the beginning Hotch had never doubted thats how it would be.

***

Currently, however, he was venturing into the unknown and as he approached the office of the director of the FBI he could no longer chase away his nerves with memories of the past. He reached the end of the hallway and stood there for a moment, reluctant to open the office doors knowing they were all that stood between him and the verdict that would determine his and Spencer’s fate. In his sadness he thought once more of his lover and remembered that he'd always knew this moment would come. He had accepted his fate that day in the ambulance and he would accept this. Regardless of what came of all this, his future included Spencer and that was the only certainty he needed in his life. 


	17. Text Interlude

S: When we’re old will you still wash my hair?

A: Since I’m older I think I’m the one who gets to be making sponge bath demands.

S: You can’t call seniority on favors.

A: If I’m still alive by the time you get old then yes I will wash your hair.

S: You will be. You’re going to live to be at least 90.

A: You can’t know that.

S: No, but I can make an educated guess based on your health, habits, environment, and risk factor.  
S: Though I am being particularly optimistic and fairly lenient in regards to risk factor.

A: You’ve thought about this extensively?

S: I wouldn’t say extensively. But having an accurate time frame of when you might die is helpful when envisioning the future.

A: Envisioning the future?

S: You know, like wondering what kind of people we’ll be later in life. If we stay in D.C. forever, if we do anything after this job, when we'll get married, if we'll have any kids.  
S: Wondering when I’m going to have to start saving for your funeral...

A: You think about all that?

S: No this has all been a typo.

A: Meet me at our usual spot. I really need to kiss you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jesus did I really just post 17 chapters in one night? Okay now I'm stopping for real, even though one of my favorite chapters is coming up but I have to at least pretend to edit them a bit before I dump them on here. The next portion of this story will be up by the end of the week. :)
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	18. The Working Relationship

"How do you think they work together?"

Emily's question hung in the air of the conference room for a minute while the team thought about it. Spencer knew the exact answer but wasn't going to offer insight.

"Obviously pretty well if they managed to get this close." JJ said.

"Yeah but wouldn't you get sick of one another?" Morgan asked. "To see someone all day every day then go home with them every night. I mean, I love you guys but some weeks I'm not trying to see any more of you than I have to."

"The feeling is mutual." Emily said. "But I was thinking more along the lines of working out in the field. Wouldn't emotions get in the way."

"Are you saying you don't feel any sentiment towards any of us Emily?" asked Rossi. "And yet you don't let your feelings get in the way of your job."

"Well yeah I like you just fine Rossi, but I certainly don't _'ache to be so close to your body that I might try to crawl into your suit while you're still wearing it_ '." She said reading directly from the website. "These two seem way too emotional for agents. I mean they hardly seem like the kind of logical, cool-headed pawns the FBI trains us to be."

"Maybe that's exactly why." Spencer said quietly, almost unaware that he had said anything out loud. When the team looked up at him he knew he had to continue. "They can't be emotional at work so they compartmentalize and the romanticism is galvanized though text where theres no consequence for it.

 _At least_ was _no consequence._ He thought.

Rossi eyed him curiously. "That's a reasonable theory. So we could assume these guys are a part of a team that handles serious cases. If the subject of their texts is a contrast to their work situation it's likely theres a substantial amount of pressure for them to remain emotionless and logical. They'd have to be experts at compartmentalizing."

"Yeah I can't see white collar being as intense as swat or terrorism." Emily said. "Not that they don't have a certain division of emotion but they'd be less likely to need an outlet."

"Do you think these two are only together as a coping mechanism?" JJ said. She sounded sad like she didn't want to believe in her own theory.

"I can't imagine you could build something this deep off of anything but deep trust and understanding." Rossi said. "The kind you build when having someone's back for a long time. If it did start as a way to cope I doubt theres any going back now."

"It could be any one of us." Morgan joked. His casual tone not quite cutting through the severity of the conversation.

They sat in silence, thinking through their own theories and skimming the text chat. Spencer had stopped pretending to look through them an hour ago. His mind was too filled with thoughts of what was going to happen to them to pretend to be figuring this out.

He and Hotch had talked about telling the team. Or at least they had started to dozens of times. Each time they would end up on a tangent, intentional or not, and get distracted from the main issue - one they had no idea how to solve. How could they keep working together after they told the team?

Spencer had offered to quit once but had regretted it the minute he saw Hotch's reaction. When Hotch countered saying he'd take Strauss up on the offer of early retirement Spencer was sure his reaction was just as devastated. Neither of them wanted to leave, both the job or each other. They liked seeing each other all the time. They were together so much Spencer felt itchy when they were apart.

Months ago Hotch had taken Jack camping for nearly a week and when he came home Spencer had ran to Hotch like he was returning from war. After catching up the two of them clung to each other in the center of their bed, sticky and sweaty but in no rush to release each other and shower. At the time Spencer's feeling of happiness lived parallel to a terrifying fear that he had grown so dependent on someone. He was being melodramatic when he spent the weekend alone yearning for Hotch to come back. What if he never did? Hotch knew of these fears, even if Spencer didn't voice them, and he had a habit of kissing them away at just the right times.

He needed less reassurance these days but that fear still existed. But logic did too and if one of them did have to walk away Spencer knew that they'd be able to handle it. He knew they would find a way to make a "normal" relationship work. One where you only saw your spouse after they got back from work and then kissed them goodbye in the morning. The problem with their line of work was that that coming home from work wasn't always guaranteed. Spencer shuttered to think about the gravity of that. He wasn't going to go down that road, especially now that he saw his life imploding in front of him. What if he had to leave? What if he wasn't around to have Hotch's back, to make sure that never happened? It was a silly thought, he didn't see himself as Hotch's protector. Except that maybe he did. Hotch had always been his and there wasn't a bone in Spencer's body that wouldn't return the sentiment. 

"Spence?" 

He looked up at JJ who had been starting at him. The rest of the team looked over as her soft voice interrupted the silence. "What?"

"You look distracted. Whats on your mind?" she asked.

It was a minute before he answered, and when he did he couldn't make his voice any less small. Or any less sad. "Whats going to happen to them?"

The sighs of the room told him that the team wasn't any more optimistic than he was. He swallowed a lump in his throat and tried not to let the mood steal these moments from him. They might be his last memories of working with his team.


	19. Text Interlude

S: You looked really good today. 

A: Oh yeah? 

S: Like really good. ;) 

A: Go on. 

S: You pinned him down so easily. You're so strong. 

A: All in a day's work. 

S: And you were all sweaty and disheveled afterwards.

A: Hmm?

S: And so out of breath. 

A: Where is this going? 

S: I just wanted to rip that vest off of you. 

A: Thats more like it. 

S: And undo your tie. 

A: Yeah? ;)

S: Because it looked like you might need help breathing.

A: I hate you. 

S: No you don't. 

A: Don’t make me pin you down when we get home.

S: Promise? 

A: Actually I might not have the strength for it.

S: Wait no.

A: I'm too tired. Will likely still be catching my breath.

S: No!!!!


	20. The Director

At the end of the hall was the office of the director of the FBI, a man Hotch had met and a man he knew Spencer knew well. It was information he shouldn’t have and that Spencer never gave him, but he hoped he wouldn’t be betraying anyone’s confidences by leaning on it now.

“Come in.” A voice said before Hotch could knock. He didn't know how long he had been standing at the end of the hallway. Hotch took a deep breath, hoped this wasn’t his last conversation as an agent, and pushed open the cracked door.

Inside was a large and warmly decorated office. A woman sat at the first desk and smiled at him. In front of her desk stood an intimidating man who waited patiently for Hotch’s first move.

For the first time in his whole career Hotch relaxed his stance, did his best to unfurl his brow and looked at the director without any mask or work persona on. For the purposes of this conversation he was just a man coming to beg for another man’s job. “Thank you for meeting with me, sir.”

At Hotch’s subtle concession the director deflated a little and smiled warmly at him. “I suppose you can also call me John.”

John waved a hand towards his office and Hotch walked through glass office doors into an even bigger office with a wall of windows overlooking all of Quantico. Before following him in John turned to his secretary. “Why don’t you take an early lunch? Theres nothing that can’t wait until the afternoon.”

The woman smiled and took her leave. The two men now alone were left to size each other up.

“It would be pointless of me to claim I don’t know why you’re here or what this is about.” The other man announced before sitting behind his desk. Hotch followed suit in one of the leather chairs in front of it.

“Before I begin I’d just like to say that I don’t mean to assume anything and Spencer and I have never discussed-” Hotch started.

“Just like I don’t mean to assume anything and Spencer and I have never discussed you?” Hotch was silent as he knew this to be true. “It’s hard to know everything about someone and not discover their secrets. Add being a profiler on top of that and I can’t imagine you and Spencer can hide anything from each other.”

“I know you called this meeting but I know why and if you’ll allow me I’m going to talk through most of it.” At a nod from Hotch he continued. “While Spencer has never betrayed your confidence it wasn’t hard on the rare occasion that his relationship came up to put two and two together. If what he says about you and what I know about you is true then you’re here to vie for his job.”

“You’d be correct.”

“That isn’t necessary. I say this not because I am doing him any favors but because in addition to being an intellectual asset to the bureau he has an above average track record and has only grown better and more indispensable under your supervision. Even if he were to leave the BAU I can think of a handful of other teams that would be at my door begging for a chance to scoop him up. That being said my protection only lasts as far as his contract. The repercussions and potential consequences of this might extend beyond my reach. Sadly we don’t work in an environment that always sees the best in its people and try as I might its easy to find prejudices slip in through jaded hearts. Not to mention politically minded ladder climbers will use anything to their advantage and we don't exactly screen for homophobia. Theres a lot of factors I have no control over.”

“I understand.”

“And I’m assuming you understood this when you started this relationship? Neither of you strike me as the kind of men to jump into something with so many risks, and yet you both risked everything for each other.”

“I don’t think I would say that.” Hotch countered, feeling braver about the outcome of this conversation as it went on.

“You wouldn’t?”

“To say that would imply that everything and Spencer are the two sides of a coin. To me they are mutually exclusive. To not risk everything would mean losing everything. Jumping all in was the only choice.”

It’s not the strongest argument but it’s true. Hotch had never doubted his choices when it came to his relationship. 

“And I suppose you are the type of man who would take risks,” John mused, looking out the window. He was truly taking in Hotch words and it only heightened the pressure he felt. “Especially considering you went straight to the top to discuss the outcome of all this. With how long you two have been involved it would make more sense to start testing the waters with HR or a section chief before bringing it up through the chain of command.”

“Why waste time jumping through hoops if in the end the answer is no? Everything is everything, either we have our jobs or we don’t. There’s no evaluation for this, at least not that I’ve consulted on.” Hotch crossed his leg and leaned into the chair a bit more. He felt like he was in a therapy session, not begging for forgiveness from his boss. “Theres nothing I would expect to get away with from anyone in the chain of command that I wouldn’t expect you to allow. In theory that’s the way it’s supposed to work.”

“In theory our employees aren’t supposed to be sleeping with one another.” 

Hotch chuckled at the sight of a smile on John’s face. He really liked the man. It was unfortunate that this conversation had a high chance of ending with him being fired, but at least the blow would be delivered by someone who respected him.

“You haven’t asked me about your job yet.” 

“I assume this is the end of it. Is that not why you planned on doing all the talking?”

“I can’t imagine our training in negotiation tactics advises admitting defeat before broaching the subject.” The director raises an eyebrow.

“I’m not here as a negotiator, profiler, or lawyer. I’m just a man awaiting his sentence.”

John took a minute to ponder Hotch and everything that he had been presented. The director had done his research, he knew enough about Hotch’s career, about his choices, to believe he had an honest view of the man. 

“Aside from prolonging the inevitable consequences of this relationship - would you say that throughout your career you have upheld the standards of the Federal Bureau of Investigation?”

The question surprised Hotch. He didn’t expect to get to weigh in on his own fate. “I suppose my first instinct to answering that question would be to look at my track record on paper, which unfortunately includes several instances of being asked to transfer or step down, a handful of people who have been vocal about not wanting me to move any higher than my current rank, several instances of my job and personal life intersecting, and on top of all of that I slept with a younger, male subordinate.”

“I just want you to know you’re doing a terrible job.” John interrupted, but he did so with a glint of humor in his eye.

Hotch laughed, unashamed. “Well according to our motto one Integrity is one of our core tenants so I’m afraid I have to be honest here.”

“Do you consider these allegations against you to be representative of your character?”

“If you had asked me more than a year ago I might have said yes. I would be lying if I said I didn’t consider each infraction a personal shortcoming.” Hotch started answering, believing himself unsure of his answer but then the words just started coming. “But having someone extremely stubborn, analytical to a fault, and almost consistently right in your corner does a lot to one’s perspective and sense of self. Spencer has always stood by me and convinced me that if my view of myself is influenced by these transgressions it must also include the years worth of decisions that resulted in success. He’s also helped me understand that I can’t rely on an outsider’s view of my actions to provide an accurate account of my intentions.”

Hotch sighed as he continued, almost wistful. “Sometimes there just isn’t a right answer in the moment we come across the question but we have to answer it or be wrong by default. And for every decision I made that didn’t turn out as well as the bureau had hoped there was a better decision I could have made that still may have turned out worse. There isn’t always a way of knowing how it’s going to go. If I believed myself faultless or that there was a way to guarantee an outcome it would be a disservice to my team and a misrepresentation of the job.

“I’ve acknowledged when I’ve been wrong and I will continue to do so. In some ways a relationship is seeing yourself through someone else’s eyes and I’ve found it’s more important to find an honest view than a flattering one. Spencer knows the truth about every moment in my career and I trust his opinion of it - because he’d the first to call me out if he believed I wasn’t holding myself up to my own standard. The whole team would. I have my own personal assessment of my choices but it will always be filtered through their opinion of me. Especially Spencer. He knows this job as well as he knows me and he’s the most accurate jury I can find.”

When John didn’t speak Hotch felt himself moving into closing arguments. He didn't come in here to make any declarations, but he slipped so easily into the confidence he once wore in court and now wore to work everyday. The kind of confidence he had built for others' benefit and would not use for his own gain, and that made all the difference.

“I have done the best job that I can do for the years I have been leading this unit. And if that’s enough for me to continue doing so I will keep doing it. But if it’s decided that it’s not I’m not leaving with any regrets or any doubt that I did right by my team.”

The silence that followed filled the room and Hotch, a man who had made many speeches, had spoken in front of a number of important figures and crowds, and had done so in some of the most high pressure situations a man can find himself in, felt his hands shaking. That confidence was surprisingly fleeting, a feeling Hotch was not used to. The two men just stared at each other for a moment while Hotch’s impromptu speech affected them both. Hotch believed everything he said, but he had surprised himself. For someone who had a lot of his life laid bare in front of the FBI somehow this seemed like the most intimate. After several minutes of silence John breathed life into the room again with a long sigh.

“I suppose I was wrong when I said I would do all the talking.”

Hotch could feel himself regaining his work demeanor again. He had laid it all out on the table there was nothing left but the work. “My team and I will determine who it is that’s targeting us and we will turn over all the information we find to the proper channels. Whatever you believe to be the best course of action I will respect with no objections.”

“And will Spencer?”

“I can’t make any promises in his absence. If I’m no longer his boss I have absolutely no authority over him.”

John smiled and Hotch returned it, though the gesture of kindness in contrast to the sudden severity of the discussion was almost debilitating. As he stood up from the desk and shook hands with the director it felt too much like a goodbye for him to hang any hope on remaining with the bureau.

“One last question,” John asked as Hotch approached the door. “How do you do it?”

“Sir?”

“You and your team go running towards the most dangerous minds in the country in these high stakes scenarios, and the person you love most - your everything as you specified earlier - is running next to you. As field agents we stress how important it is to be objective and detached, to not let our emotions get in the way of a clear head. How do you take what means most to you into a vulnerable situation and know you’ll be able to justify every decision you make while doing so?”

“The reason I can justify every decision to the FBI is because I have to justify them to Spencer. We trust each other to do our job as best as we can each and every time because people die if we don’t. If I want to be the leader he deserves I can’t think of him like he’s everything because out there in the field ‘everything’ has to include my team, the victims, local officers- anyone who needs the protection of the FBI. I made a vow to both the bureau and to him that I’d do my best to serve them. So I suppose the reason I can do this job so effectively and without bias is both because of him and in spite of him.”

“Thank you Agent Hotchner.”

As he left the office that feeling of sadness gave way to a very small shred of hope. The hallway didn’t look so big and intimidating any more.


	21. Text Interlude

A: I miss you.

S: We were together all week.

A: I don't sleep well without you.

S: I don't either. You should come over.

A: I don't want to come over.

S: Then invite me over there.

A: I don't want to invite you over.

S: Do I have to explain to you how illogical your predicament is?

A: Wouldn't you like to stop choosing which apartment we go to or having to have half our things at the others?

S: You want your things back?

A: Yes. In fact I'm thinking of getting a new house and keeping all of my things in one place.

S: oh

A: Including you.

S: OH!!!


	22. The Birthday

As the day continued Reid's sadness just melted into an aggravated worry that simmered while his friends poked at it. 

At one point Garcia had come back, no doubt bored of sitting in her office with no one to share her findings with. After attempting to reenact several raunchy scenes that they found within the texts with Morgan Rossi had kicked her out. 

"Aw come on Rossi, don't tell me you've never tried to hold anyone up against a wall before?"

"If I did I can guarantee you you'll never read about it." The older man had huffed. "Aren't you supposed to be tracking down this hacker?"

"Yes, in fact I came to give Hotch an update. Is he back?" she asked.

"No, we haven't seen him for a while." Emily said.

"He's not in his office?" JJ wondered. "I just assumed-"

"He said he had a meeting." Garcia said with a far off voice. When she didn't continue her man squeezed her shoulder.

"Earth to Penelope." Morgan chimed.

"I gotta go." Garcia turned on her cherry red pumps and high tailed it out of there as fast as they would let her. Confused stares followed her out.

"Was that weird to anyone else?"

"Too much dirty talk maybe." Emily quipped. "It's finally getting to her."

Morgan laughed dropping back into his chair. The mood in the room was back to the casual amusement it had started the day with. It was an emotional see saw that Reid wanted to get off of. Morgan winked at Emily. "Can there be too much of a good thing?"

Spencer huffed at his friends comment, which only shifted attention to him. He really had to stop reacting to things.

“What?”

“Nothing. Just sick of reading this conversation.”

“Really? I thought you’d be eating this up.” Morgan lightly punched Reid in the shoulder.

“What? Why?”

“Because I bet you wish you were getting texts like these from some little lady genius, huh?” Morgan stuck his tongue out.

If you only knew. Reid thought. 

"Hey, one of them has a birthday in October." JJ pointed out. Reid scowled as the rest of the team jumped on the detail. "It sounds like it was a _very_ fun birthday.

"That could narrow it down. What day?"

"The 28th."

"Spencer isn't that your birthday?" Morgan asked.

"Yeah, and weren't you reading October?" Emily piled on facts that Reid was not keen on revealing.

"I didn't notice."

The team looked at him strangely. They all knew their friend was acting out of character but had yet to address it amongst the chaos of the day. Reid didn't care. He was lost in his own uncertainties and no one had seemed to be putting two and two together yet. This however, might change that.

"How did you, of all people, not notice-"

“Do you know anyone else who shares your birthday? It wouldn't surprise me if you've read the office personnel files. You know, for fun.” Rossi asked, speaking over Morgan's objections. He studied the younger man’s irritation and Reid could sense the wheels turning. He didn’t like the consideration. 

“No.” He shot back. “I could look into it though. In fact why don’t I focus on that?”

Rossi didn’t stop looking at him with that studious look on his face. “Alright kid.”

Suddenly irritated with everyone in the room Reid gathered his things. 

“Where you going?”

“Need more coffee. And I think I’ll be more comfortable at my desk.” With that he stormed out in search of the rest of his sanity.

“Whats that about?” Morgan wondered, ignorant to the effects his teasing was having on his friend.

“I don’t know, but I’m adding it to my list of things to find out.” Rossi said with determination.

As the agents returned to their assignment Rossi dug back into the conversation, narrowing down his suspicions.


	23. Text Interlude

S: Darling

A: Yes?

S: Babe

A: What?

S: My love

A: What is happening?

S: The unsub refers to his victims by pet names.

A: I don’t mind nicknames but I'd also prefer you not murder me.

S: How is a psychopath more romantic than us?

A: You think we're not romantic because you call me by my name?

S: Half the time I call you by your last name.  
S: I don't write you letters or buy you flowers, we don't have pet names or a song or any of the typical traditions of a romantic relationship.

A: We don't have a traditional relationship.  
A: Are you saying you want romance?

S: I don't know I've never really experienced romance.

A: Well sweetheart, buckle up. You are about to get the full experience.

S: Would a traditional relationship involve me being very concerned about this?


	24. The Network

Hotch wandered back to the BAU but he took his time doing so. He was so lost in thought he didn’t notice he had ridden past their floor on the elevator. On his way back up he had no chance of missing it because a blonde beam of energy just happened to be passing as the doors opened.

“Sir!”

Hotch snapped to attention, standing up straighter and striding out into the hall. “Garcia?”

“I was just coming to find you.” 

“Any update?” He asked nervously but the way Garcia was acting didn’t imply that she had figured out who the couple was. He was sure her reaction was bound to be extreme. He'd likely have heard from whatever floor he was on.

“Yes, though probably not what you hoped for.”

“What do you mean?” 

“I can’t get details on who put the site up because technically I did.”

Hotch furrowed his brow at her, not understanding. She was right, it definitely wasn’t what he expected.

“I mean not _me_ me, but my IP address did. The only way someone could have managed that would be by launching it from this building by piggybacking off the FBI networks address. So all I can definitively say is that whoever is hosting the site is on this floor and has access to my network.”

“Who would have access to your network?”

"Well since I was shot and suspended that list has included more people than I’d like, but technically they didn’t have to fully infiltrate my network to spoof the IP address so that makes the list even longer. I keep all the good stuff locked up tight so I don't think they could have gotten anything off my network per say, but the FBI doesn’t like it when I keep all the keys to myself so theres parts of it that those with a high enough clearance can access but I didn't have any of these texts to begin with so it couldn't have come from me-”

“Garcia!”

“Right! Okay, I would say any senior analyst on this floor, a few people from IA, you, your boss, presumably your boss’s boss and I guess in theory the entire IT department.”

“So thats a list of like, what 15-20 people?”

“More like 20-30 but I could probably narrow it down.”

“Do that and send me the list when you have it.”

“Consider it done.”

“And Penelope?”

Garcia paused at the use of her first name. Her boss was being awfully candid today. “Yes sir?”

“Thank you for not tracing the couple.”

“How do you know I didn’t trace them?” She asked. He didn’t answer, but smiled at her before heading into the bullpen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know these chapters are light but ya girl needs to get through some plot real quick. Trust me theres more coming.
> 
> Thanks for all the comments!


	25. Text Interlude

S: I think I know where he's keeping them.

A: We're in the conference room if you care to share. Also wrong phone.

S: Whoops.

A: Don't tease me like that.


	26. The Couch

Hotch entered the BAU and wasn’t surprised to see his team still in the conference room pouring over the texts. After all it was a years worth of memories. That and he knew none of them were in a hurry to get back to their reports and paperwork. Work that actually mattered. At an initial glance he frowned when he didn’t see Spencer sitting around the table with them. Finding the bullpen empty as well he made his way to his office.

He clicked on the light for the first time all day and looked at his desk. The unwavering stack of papers. A few small awards he had accrued. The picture of Haley and Jack he kept behind him. The picture of Jack on his desk he looked at often. The secret picture of Spencer that was taped under one of the drawers at his partner’s insistence.

“Are you going to miss it?”

Spencer’s voice somehow filled him with relief while simultaneously scaring the shit out of him. Not that you'd know. He calmly turned to find him laying on his couch with his hand over his eyes blocking out the light. Hotch switched the light back off and made he way over to him. He laid his entire weight on the other man and buried his face into his neck, crinkling his nose when Spencer’s curls tickled his face.

“Aaron!” Spencer groaned at the weight of him but Hotch knew he liked it. As if to confirm so, Spencer wiggled his arms free and wrapped them around the older man’s chest and arms. He squeezed as tight as he could and whispered, “Someone is going to see us.”

Hotch laughed at the idea that the two of them laying here was any more scandalous than the texts where he details how he wants to rip all of Spencer's clothing off with his teeth and lick every inch of skin he can find. Reimagining these texts now while he was considerably not horny made him cringe. He had never considered himself a particularly shameless or scurrilous communicator but somehow nothing was embarrassing or off-limits with Spencer.

With the team? Yeah, all of that is off-limits. Well, _was_.

“I hate not being able to text you.”

“Me too. Where were you?” Spencer asked. 

“Have you had lunch? Hotch deflected.

“No, I don’t think anyone has. They’re too enraptured in our love story.”

For the first time Hotch considers how romantic this might be if his privacy wasn’t so precious. Reid seemed to be having a similar thought. It was dreamy to think of this as a love story being told about them instead of a hack that threatened to take them down.

How would this love story end? What would the office say about the men they had read about? Would their legacy exist as an office scandal, to be brought up every so often as the butt of a joke whenever anyone in the office got too flirty? Would anyone be sympathetic and glean even just a bit of what he and Spencer felt for each other? Would the amount of people who stuck up for them be greater than those who would vilify him? 

That last one he wasn't sure about.

"Did you ever imagine them finding out like this?" Spencer asked.

"Like this? Not at all."

Spencer chuckled. "Ok maybe not like this, but there was always a chance they'd find out before we were ready to tell."

"Would we ever have been ready to tell?" Hotch whispered the question into the side of Spencer's skull like he was trying to ask his brain directly. 

Spencer couldn't answer him. Well maybe he could but he didn't want to. He just wanted to mope a bit longer. He whined when Hotch started to pull away from his neck.

“No.” Spencer crossed his arms once Hotch escaped his grasp, fully aware that he looked like a little kid being told he couldn’t have ice cream. Even pouting in the dark in the middle of a crisis he looked beautiful. Hotch smiled down at him, and if the light had been on Spencer might have seen the tear that threatened to fall before Hotch wiped his hands over his face like he was resetting himself. 

Before his hands leave his face Spencer reached up and grabbed each wrist. Hotch braced himself so his lover could pull himself up enough for a quick peck before dropping himself back onto the couch. Hotch laughed but the kissed had settled him all the same.

They decide to take the team out for lunch and neither thinks about it possibly being their last.


	27. Text Interlude

A: Take your glasses off.

S: What? I didn't bring my contacts.

A: You did that on purpose.

S: Did what on purpose?

A: You know I find them distracting.

S: How so?

A: ...

S: What??

A: If you don't take them off I am going to throw you over this table and fuck you so hard they fall off.

S: We're in the middle of a police station.   
S: This conference room is all windows.

A: And yet you're still wearing your glasses.

S: I need them to see!  
S: And thats not exactly an incentive to take them off...

A: Then I guess I'll have to punish you in front of the entire Portland police department.

S: And the team. Do you think E would leave the room or keep staring at the evidence board?

A: I wanna see how much noise I can get you to make before she turns around.  
A: Ok that is absolutely not what I meant.

S: What?

A: Get your glasses out of your mouth.

S: I'm just sitting here, looking contemplative, chewing the end of my glasses. What ever do you mean?

A: If you need something to suck on I will give you something to suck on.

S: More empty threats.

A: Wonder if you'll still be this cocky when I refuse to untie you from the hotel bed tomorrow morning.

\---

S: I hate you.

A: I didn't even touch you.   
A: I forget how easy it is to get a reaction out of you.  
A: You make the best noises.

S: She could tell something was up. She looked at me funny.

A: Maybe she was distracted by your glasses?


	28. The Speculation

JJ mindlessly scrolled through the chat watching the green boxes float up the screen with increasing disinterest. She had read all of them. A whole years worth of conversations between two of the most romantic people she had ever not met. It completely baffled her.

She stopped the scroll with her finger suddenly and read what she landed on. No matter where she landed she’d no doubt land on something sweet that would both pull at her heartstrings and tug at the guilt she had accrued for sniffing through their privacy..

_S: Remember how I bought that keyboard to teach myself piano? A passed a store selling sheet music. What are your favorite songs so I can look for them?_

She sighed like a school girl with a crush. Not that she felt anything for either of the texters, but she felt a strange kinship with them. She had stopped trying to figure them out. It was almost like she owed it to them to keep their secret.

Maybe that would assuage her guilt for reading all of it in the first place.

“So, how long are we going to pretend to profile these guys?” Rossi leaned back in his chair and waited to collect reactions.

“What do you mean?” Morgan asked. He may still have the website pulled up but JJ suspected he also had a few other tabs open - and maybe some conversations of his own going on.

“Come on, like we didn’t all give up on this before we started. To use the BAU to out two men who obviously just aren’t doing any harm to anyone. It’s shameful.” JJ was shocked to see Rossi so animated about it. His declaration only fueled what she was thinking.

“I agree. I already feel bad for reading as much as I did.” JJ said. “There isn’t anything in here that suggests these men pose any threat.”

“Shouldn’t we be concerned with why the site was sent to us?” Morgan asked. A devil’s advocate who was already swayed. He had turned off his tablet and clearly didn’t feel passionate about continuing the search.

“Garcia is working on the site. If it was supposed to be a distraction or a trojan horse of sorts we’d already have heard something by now, right?” said Emily.

JJ kept her eyes on Rossi who looked content having sown doubt through the group. When their conversation started to dwindle he threw another offering to the table.

“What do you think has the kid all bunchy?” He gestured behind him towards the bullpen. JJ looked past him to catch a glimpse of her friend but didn’t see him at his desk. Where had he gone?

“Maybe he just doesn’t like talking about relationships?” Emily wondered. “You know he’s not exactly a romantic.”

“I wouldn’t say that.” Said JJ her eyes not leaving Spencer’s desk. “Anyone who reads that much literature surely has an inclination for some romance. You just have to get past a LOT of science and Dr. Who to find it.”

Morgan chuckled. “I wonder what his idea of sexy talk would be. _I want to kiss you on the command deck of the USS Enterprise._ ”

“Okay, says the guy who correctly referenced Star Trek.” Emily scoffed.

“Give me a break, the kid made me watch a few episodes the last time we hung out.” Morgan said defensively before admitting defeat. “They were actually pretty good.”

“Did he act strangely the last time you hung out?”

“It’s been a while. A long while actually. That was months ago.” 

JJ thought back on the last time she had hung out with Spencer. “Yeah he and I haven’t gone out to dinner since last winter.”

Emily pondered that. “That’s strange. What about Henry? I thought he saw him regularly.”

“He does. Now that Henry is in school Hotch and I have been getting the boys together to do homework sometimes. Spence has been there the last few times. Jack calls him their “expert witness” since he always knows everything about their assignments.”

“But outside of ‘homework night’ no one has any idea what the kid has been up to outside the BAU?” Rossi asked.

“I guess not.” Morgan looked hard at a spot on the table with shame.

“Ok let’s not get ahead of ourselves.” Emily said to the diminishing group. “He’s just in a bad mood today. This is a relatively new development, he’s been his same old self before this.”

JJ considered this. She had a point. Spencer had seemed happy before this morning. She hadn’t noticed anything wrong with him in the past few months, and if he had she was sure she would have reached out. 

Before they could speculate further Hotch walked into the room. The team moved as if to grab their files and tablets again, but there was no fooling Hotch. Luckily he didn't seem to be in too much of a bad mood as he surveyed his team.

“I think we could all use a lunch break.” He said.

“You read my mind.” Said Morgan perking up. He grabbed his things without hesitation and left the room first, presumably to scoop up Garcia.

“You know there is a new Italian place that opened an exit north of here. A nice sit down place with some outdoor seating. Might take us a bit longer to get there but...” Rossi looked at their boss as if for reassurance. JJ could laugh. Rossi was never subtle and always quick to take advantage.

“If you promise not to get in an argument with the chef I will forgive any tardiness.” 

“That Lasagne was an insult to Italian craftsmanship and you know it!”

The two bickering men followed Morgan out of the room and JJ was glad they both wore smiles. Suddenly it seemed like the air in the office had changed. Her and Emily brought up the rear, with Emily calling down to Reid as they rounded the room.

“Reid! You coming? Italian!”

JJ turned and spotted Reid at his desk. He popped his head up like a startled mole. Had he been there the whole time? He grabbed his messenger bag as a sign of acceptance and the team was off. JJ quickened her pace to fall into step next to him before putting her arm through his. He flinched with surprise but quickly let his guard down when he realized it was her. She gave him a smile and was relieved when he returned it. 

Whatever was happening today all she cared about what that her friend was ok.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I told myself I was gonna pace myself but that went right out the window. I'm just so excited to share the end of this one! Even though I know how it ends I feel like I'm excited to read it as I'm writing it! Haha.


	29. Text Interlude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We got some wikipedia up in here....
> 
> It's getting really hard to write text excerpts (texcerpts?) that aren't very obviously Hotch and Reid. (So we're just going to pretend this isn't very obviously some Reid nonsense.)

A: When we get home will you tell me about that movie you watched last night?

S: The documentary on the naval officer who first charted the ocean's winds and currents?

A: Yes.

S: Why didn’t you just watch it with me?

A: Because I don’t care about oceans.

A: I just want to hear your voice for a while.

S: Then can I talk about the Tabula Rogeriana? If we're gonna talk about the origins of cartography the middle ages has a much richer history to pull from.  
S: Plus I find it fascinating the way al-Idrisi compiled enough information from the classical experts of different geographical quadrants with the stories of explorers and merchants to create a detailed enough map that it remained the most accurate world map for nearly four centuries.  
S: He also made an estimate of the circumference of the world, accurate to within 10%!

A: I said HEAR your voice.  
A: But yes you can talk about whatever you want.


	30. The Car Ride

Lunch was exactly what they needed.

Spencer managed to relax as the chatter of the table stayed far away from the drama that was haunting him back at the office. No one mentioned the texts. It seemed as though he and Hotch weren't the only ones avoiding solving this "case." Halfway though the meal he felt Hotch's hand on his knee. It felt right. He didn't have to suppress any nerves at being caught or feel anxious about the team seeing them. Maybe everything was going to be fine.

When Morgan suddenly signaled him out he ripped his knee from Hotch's grip so quickly that he banged it against the metal table leg. Maybe he was still a little nervous. Turns out Morgan was only bringing up the story about how he locked himself out of the suburban. _Again._

As the team made their way out of the restaurant hearts and stomachs much fuller, Spencer was corralled towards the back of the group.

“Hey kid, ride back with me will ya?” Rossi said it quietly, like it was a secret. This couldn't be good. 

Spencer resisted the urge to look at Hotch, extra cautious given the circumstances and how strange he was being. It was Rossi after all. Rossi didn’t let anyone ride with him because he valued Italian leather over carpooling. Spencer agreed to the ride unsure if he should sit in the passenger seat or if that was reserved for the copious amount of leftovers Rossi had left with. This chef had evidently passed his expectations. In the end sat shotgun with the pasta in his lap.

“Pretty wild day, huh?” Rossi started once they had pulled away from the lot.

Spencer scoffed. “Yeah, it makes reading through a decade's worth of Robert Burke’s journals about kidnapping and murdering women seem like nothing compared to this.”

“Huh.” Rossi mused, but didn’t say anything else. It drove Spencer crazy.

“What?”

“I just thought it’d take a bit more prodding to get you this defensive. Am I right in thinking you have a role in this, shall I say, office soap opera?”

Spencer sighed and slouched in his seat. Why prolong the inevitable? Somehow it was always going to be Rossi, he just imagined he’d go to Aaron first.

“I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. We knew you’d all find out eventually, I just didn’t expect it to be this... exposed?”

Rossi whistled and Spencer caught the senior agent’s eyebrows raise in the rearview mirror. He turned to inspect Rossi’s shocked reaction and found the agent laughing.

“That was my easiest interrogation yet.”

“I thought you just said you knew it was me?”

“It was one of a few theories, and definitely not my strongest. I thought you knew something about it, maybe someone had told you and you were terrible at keeping a secret. Or you had an idea and were jealous and that’s why you were all moody. Plus I wasn’t so sure it was you because if it was then theres really only one person you could be texting.”

Spencer sat with his arms crossed as Rossi processed this discovery. They both knew who they were talking about but Spencer was done giving up information so easily.

“How-” Rossi started and stopped, unsure of what or how to ask. “When did- How did we miss this?”

Spencer smiled. He was kind of proud of that. While he didn’t like lying to everyone it was good to know that he could have something that was just his, he didn’t have to let the FBI have everything. Also, truth be told, sneaking around was hot. If he looked back and had to do it all over again he thought they'd likely still chose to keep it a secret, even with all the stress it was currently giving them.

“It’s kind of easy to hold a secret that no one would possibly believe. I could sit on his lap on the jet and everyone would just make fun of me for being his favorite.” Spencer said then immediately blushed. “Not that we’d ever do anything on the plane or anything.”

“You sure seem to want to from what I’ve read.”

Sadly Spencer could think of several texts that Rossi could be referring to. Rossi looked over to catch him growing even more pink and regretted it.

“Sorry kid. It must be hard to have it all out on the table. Especially in front of this particular team.”

“Garcia can already quote most of it by memory and Derek is eager to high five “the worlds biggest playa”. Can’t imagine he’ll feel the same when he figures out who it actually is.”

“You’re worried the team will react badly? It’ll be a shock sure, but they’ll get over it.”

“I don’t think anyone is going to burn us at the stake but we can’t go back. Theres no going back from this and you know it.”

He had a point. Rossi let the conversation breathe as they slowed to a stop light. Spencer leaned his head towards the window, slightly cracked so that the breeze carried his hair a bit off his face. He looked older than Rossi had ever seen him. Then again he'd never seen him like this, through this lens. He wondered if this was closer to the Spencer Aaron saw. He could understand how easily Spencer could hide behind a person’s preconceived notions of him, but Rossi had always considered himself to be outside of that phenomenon. He thought he had enough perspective. Evidently that wasn’t true.

“There’s no need to go back.” Rossi offered, and he meant it. Spencer turned back to look at him. “Whatever you two started was meant to go forward. You wouldn’t have risked it if it weren’t. Things are going to be different, theres no doubt about that, but that change has been happening for a while. It’s not as abrupt as you think. You’re ready for it.”

Spencer pondered that for a while and Rossi let him, turning the dial on the vintage car to a station where he knew some crooner would be singing some song that magically fit the moment. That's how these kinds of cars worked. Nostalgia tempered everything with just the right kind of melancholy. He knew the kid hated change but he had obviously grown significantly in the past year or two that Rossi had known him. The eager, blubbering kid he had met when he first returned to the BAU and the thoughtful, intentional one that sat next to him now were completely different people - but they still shared a lot of the best traits.

“I don’t want to leave the BAU.” His admission nearly broke Rossi's heart. A multitude of feelings about the BAU and reasons why it wasn't a dream you should depend on crossed his mind but Rossi ignored them all. That wasn't what this was about.

“Kid, do you know who you’re texting? Aaron’s gone up against the FBI for almost every member of this team, you think he’s going to do any less for you?” Rossi frowned at his next thought. “If one of you has to go-”

“I know.” There was a tear running down Spencer’s cheek that Rossi graciously ignored. Of course he knew, he knew everything.

“I knew you were his favorite.” Rossi said when he finally pulled the car into the parking garage. “I saw the way he looked at you, how close you guys were. I just never would have guessed how close. You’re right it’s easy to hide when those around you have already made up their mind as to how they see you.”

“Are you saying that you didn’t think he’d sleep with a team member or with a man?”

“I didn’t think he’d ever let himself be happy.” Rossi huffed looking out the windshield as the SUV pulled into the spot in front of them. Morgan and the girls piled out of the car laughing at some story Garcia was animatedly telling. Behind them Hotch followed, also smiling and looking more relaxed than he had all morning.

“I’m glad to see I was wrong.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok I HAVE to stop for today but who am I kidding? I will be back very very soon. This shit is just flowing out of me I can't stop!
> 
> Thanks for reading and all the lovely comments. :)


	31. Text Interlude

S: Why was he in your office so long? Do you think he knows?

A: I don’t think so.  
A: He was just inviting me out.

S: He asked you out?  
S: Should I be jealous?

A: Out to meet women presumably, though he never directly says so.

S: He does seem to have taken an interest in you lately...

A: An interest in me being his wingman and nothing more.

S: He’s in your office an awful lot...

A: You’re in my office an awful lot.

S: Yes, but I’m usually trying to have sex with you.

A: That is definitely not why he’s here.

S: When you guys went out of town for that consult did you guys share a hotel room?

A: I made him sleep in the car.

S: So did you say yes?

A: To being his wingman?

S: When he asked you out?

A: He did not ask me out on a date.

S: Did you think about it?

A: No!!

S: Aw, don’t be so hard on the guy. He’s not an unattractive man.

A: Thats it he’s fired.

S: Just for trying to sleep with his boss? What a double standard.

A: You’re next.


	32. The Letter

Their laughter simmered and they fell back into work mode as they made their way back to the bullpen. The office always had that effect on them. Garcia, as always, was the most stubborn to comply but even she fell silent as they opened the glass doors and found Strauss waiting for them.

“Did you enjoy your lunch?” The question was pointedly directed at Hotch who stood in front of the team defensively. “I came down to see how you were doing and found the entire BAU had left the building.” 

“Was lunch cancelled today? I didn’t receive a memo.”

Strauss raised her eyebrows and she wasn’t the only one. Luckily the team remained professional - even Garcia who managed to turn her surprise laugh into a small cough.

“Well I hope treating yourselves to long lunch means you’ve found something worthwhile.” She said.

Before Hotch could respond Rossi stepped up. “We’re still going through the chat. We expect to have it narrowed down to a particular department by the end of the day.”

“The end of the day? You’re telling me I had an entire team of profilers reading texts messages all morning and they can’t even narrow it down to a department yet?” She crossed her arms with a condescending look that if she could she would direct at all of them at once. Rossi ended up saddled with it, a lightening rod for her anger.

“They’re being unbelievably careful not to divulge personal information.” Emily said.

“Majority of the details we do have could pertain to almost anyone who works out of this building.” JJ added.

Morgan stepped up too. “Text messaging is an informal medium, we can’t draw as much conclusions as we could from letters or journals.”

Spencer was shocked to see his teammates so readily defend him, even if they didn’t know it was him they were defending. He knew they were bound to have narrowed their pool significantly and he didn’t know why they were being so vague with Strauss. Not that he minded of course.

Strauss looked more frustrated with every excuse the team gave. “And what about you? How have you not been able to trace the phones? Or at least take the site down? I thought you were good at that sort of thing.”

Garcia looked wild at being put on the spot, sputtering for a minute as she resisted the urge to respond in kind to Strauss’s rudeness. A flurry of what Spencer imagined were colorful responses seemed to all want to come out at once and Garcia visibly worked to contain herself. Thankfully Rossi intercepted this as well.

“Erin,” Rossi said harshly. She glared at him. “If you would like us to take a fine tooth comb through all the personal details of all FBI personnel Penelope is more than capable of doing so. We profiled it was between a boss and employee, maybe we should start with section chiefs and work our way down?”

If looks could kill Rossi would have been dead before he finished the sentence, and you didn't have to be a profiler to know what she thought of that idea.

“I’d like to see you in your office Agent Rossi.” She seethed.

“I’m sure you would.”

Rossi held his hand out, gesturing for her to go first. He looked back at Spencer and gave a little wink before following her up the stairs towards his office. The team looked after him like he was crazy. He was way to calm for someone currently herding a bull into his office.

Hotch in particular couldn’t quite grasp what was happening or what the repercussions of that would be. He supposed he’d have to thank his friend for taking one for the team, but the whole thing was still getting too out of hand for his liking.

“Um, Agent Hotchner?” Anderson appeared behind them, clearly having waited out Strauss’s interrogation and now terribly unsure if he wanted to address the cross looking unit chief.

“Yes Anderson?”

He held out a letter towards him. “This came for you while you were gone. From the director’s office.”

Hotch looked at the note for a minute before taking it. It looked thick, like there were multiple pages within the envelope. He supposed there’d be a lot of termination papers he had to sign. Waivers that he wouldn’t take legal action. An NDA or paperwork absolving the FBI of any wrongdoing in his own actions.

With a word of thanks he dismissed Anderson and started towards his office, ignoring the team’s curious glances. He avoided Spencer's eyes in particular. He was in no hurry to reveal to him the bad news. Not that it should come as any surprise. He knew they both had been expecting this at any moment.

In the safety of his office he closed his door, pulled his blinds and let himself hide in the darkness of his office. The only light source was the afternoon sun beaming through his windows, which a minute ago seemed bright and optimistic, now seemed dim and waning, like the sun couldn't wait to set. Reminding himself that it would rise again tomorrow he ripped open the envelope and accepted his fate.


	33. Text Interlude

A: You are cordially invited to dinner and a movie. I will pick you up at 7pm.  
A: Dress nice this is a real date.  
A: That brown jacket you bought last month would be great.  
A: And maybe those pants that are just a little snug on you?

S: What is this?  
S: Also we live together. You don’t have to pick me up.

A: I will be picking you up.

S: I know for a fact I did not forget an anniversary. What is this for?

A: I don’t need an excuse to take you out.

S: Do we have to do it tonight?

A: Yes.

S: Are you sure?

A: Why don’t you want to go out with me?

S: I do! It's just the Landmark plays vintage movies on Thursdays and tonights theme is 60s horror and they're playing The City of the Dead.  
S: Tonight is the only night it's playing.  
S: And I really want to see it. 

A: babe

S: And I’ve been waiting all week I didn’t know you wanted to go out tonight or I would have told you.  
S: You know how much I love Halloween!

A: honey

S: But if it means a lot to you to we can go out.

A: I will pick you up tonight for dinner and a movie. See you at 7pm and don’t wear that sad look you have on right now.

S: Sorry.  
S: Why are you so insistent on taking me out tonight?  
S: Wait a minute.

A: You’re an idiot.


	34. The Chair

_Agent Hotchner,_

_Enclosed with this letter are several forms for you and Spencer to fill out and file with HR. Naturally all of his evaluations and chain of command in the field will have to go through or be cosigned by a third party. A further list of rules and regulations is attached as well. Knowing how long you two have built this working relationship I have no doubt you will continue to uphold professional front in the field._

_You know as well as I do that everything you do after today will be looked at with scrutiny and you will be held to a higher standard when it comes to ensuring that you are not showing favoritism or showing too much lenience. Knowing that you already hold yourself to that standard is commendable._

_If it were anyone else you’d have been fired on the spot, and I would be lying if I said it wasn’t still a possibility before our meeting this morning. Don’t prove me wrong. That kid deserves love and belongs here just as much as you do. If things weren’t to work out between you two I might be inclined to take his side._

_I’m sure you understand._

_John_

Hotch breathed out a sigh he felt he had been hanging onto all day. The weight that fell off his chest after reading that letter was immeasurable. Loosing his job was going to be a very hard thing to compartmentalize and he had been preparing for it by attempting to bury any emotions he had about it.

He hadn’t been doing a good job, so it was good he didn't have to anymore.

He put the letter in the drawer that held a picture of Spencer inside. Pretty soon he could have that picture on his desk. He was smiling and likely had been the entire time he was reading the letter. He didn’t care, he was alone in his office. He could almost cheer if he weren’t worried Rossi might hear him. He would probably think Hotch was having some sort of attack. He wasn’t the kind of person who _cheered_. At least maybe not before today.

A knock at his door pulled him out of this foreign headspace and he regained composure. He didn’t know who it was and wanted to maintain any illusion before he talked to Spencer. How were they going to tell everyone?

It didn’t seem nearly as scary anymore.

Spencer poked his head in and then slipped his body in after it, like he was stealth mode. When he was in he just frowned at him and didn’t move closer.

“Why are you sitting in the dark?”

Hotch just shrugged. Another unusual move for the unit chief. Spencer almost looked concerned as he moved closer. 

“Aaron?”

He had stepped into where the sunlight streaked in from the window and the soft lighting that fell over the angles of his face painted the genius beautifully. He didn’t look any different than he usually did, yet every time Hotch looked at him he looked better than before. It’s like he had the gift of forgetting how much he loved him, then was reminded every time Spencer glanced at him and he got to experience it all over again.

Not that he’d ever forget. Not now, not ever.

“What are you thinking?” Hotch asked him. His tone didn’t reveal anything about the letter or about their predicament. Hotch was holding back, the wheels in his brain turning.

Spencer responded by slowly walking closer to and then around the desk closer to the windows. As he did he angled his head and let his hair fall off his face, as if he knew exactly how to pose in this light. Hotch sometimes wondered if Spencer _did_ know the effect he was having on him, or if he was just obliviously beautiful. When Spencer reached him, he pulled Hotch’s chair out from under the desk, and Hotch let him spin the chair to face him. One leg on either side Spencer slowly lowered himself down onto Hotch’s lap, straddling him.

“What am I thinking?” Spencer repeated to himself. Hotch was pretty sure he had an idea.

“Spencer.”

“Are you going to tell me what the letter said?”

It had been one of Hotch’s two guesses as to what his lover was thinking. He rested his hands on Spencer’s thighs before answering.

“Not yet.”

It was good news. He should tell him. He would tell him. But he held back. He wanted it to be special.

He had a bigger plan.

Spencer was looking at him like he was trying to solve a puzzle. Hotch kept his expression neutral, not giving anything away and yet hoping Spencer still gleaned some comfort from it. Though Spencer was the only one who could accurately read him sometimes. He wouldn’t be surprised if the genius figured everything out on his own.

“It would be a shame to leave this office without any stories.” He said changing the subject. A distraction. Spencer didn’t break eye contact with him but he started rubbing his hands down Hotch’s chest. When they slowed a bit over the part of his suit where the breast pocket was Hotch smiled, glad he had put the letter in his desk. 

Spencer was sneaky, and really good with his hands.

Hotch squeezed where he was holding his thighs but didn’t take the bait. “We are not having sex in this office.”

“You really don’t want to?”

“Of course I do.” He said, and he meant it. He wanted it a little too much at the moment and from the way Spencer was sitting he knew Spencer could tell. “But it’s against the rules.”

“Fucking me at all was against the rules.” Spencer pouted. “Besides, does it matter for that much longer?” 

He looked down at him and Hotch wanted to spill everything right there. Anything to make Spencer not look this sad. He held out. His plan was going to be much better.

He reached up, grabbed Spencer’s face and pulled him down for a kiss. As his lover melted into it he wrapped an arm around him and pulled him even closer, going in a bit deeper than he normally would allowed in the office.

Spencer let out a hum of contentment and pulled back just slightly to press his cheek to Hotch’s. He was crouched as close to his boss as he could manage, as if he could shrink by pure will and nestle even closer to Hotch so they'd both fit in the chair. The chair squeaked a bit in disagreement.

Hotch sat for a minute rubbing circles in his back and kissing above his ear and all the other little things he knew calmed Spencer. They weren’t always super touchy, a side effect of having to go without touching each other every day or while they were on cases, but when they were well, they _really_ were.

“Tell me it’s going to be ok.”

“It’s going to be better than ok.”

Spencer sat up to look at Hotch. “You’re sure?”

Hotch shrugged again. “Sure.”

Spencer smiled a bit at that. From behind the wall of cabinets a dull thump interrupted their moment. Hotch looked quizzically at the wall, looking closer to the Hotch everyone outside the office would recognize.

“Whats that?”

Spencer grinned. “Unlike you, Rossi is less inclined to follow the rules.”

Hotch was still looking confused. “He’s in there with Strauss.”

Spencer didn’t clarify.

“He wouldn’t-” Hotch stopped himself. Dave absolutely would. 

Spencer grinned like a kid who got to spill a secret. “I saw them together one day when I was out with Garcia.”

“And you didn’t tell me?”

“I forgot! It was at the Dr. Who convention and I had a lot of other things on my mind.”

Hotch remembered. Spencer had told him about his entire day at the convention with extraordinary detail. He always loved listening to Spencer but that conversation had taken a lot of concentration. And it was very much like Spencer to gloss over gossip that others might find important.

“They’re beating us. We can make more noise than that.” Spencer rolled his hips just enough that had Hotch snapping out of his thoughts and gripping his agent's waist.

“Absolutely not. Discussing Dave’s sex life is NOT foreplay.” 

Spencer whined but didn’t push it. He climbed off the chair and kissed an apology to Hotch’s cheek. 

“He knows by the way.” Spencer said casually as he went to leave.

Hotch raised an eyebrow. Once again Spencer burying the lead. “He say something?”

For a minute Spencer looked guilty. “He _may_ have questioned me and I _may_ have confirmed his suspicions.”

“What gave it away? Was it the part of our conversation where we were having phone sex and you stopped to lecture me on how the _imaginary_ position we were in would defy physics?”

“Maybe it was your suggestion to try roleplaying as the law professor who ties up his grad student?”

That shut Hotch up. The bewildered boss didn't have a response. His dick was considerably confused - the embarrassment of his friend reading about his roleplay fantasies conflicted with the excitement of thinking about Spencer tied up.

“Later, professor." 

A slightly cheered up Spencer slinked back out of the office.


	35. Text Interlude

S: Why aren’t you asleep?

A: You know I hate sleeping on planes. Why aren’t you?

S: I’m just enjoying the sleepy mood.

A: The sleepy mood?

S: That feeling right before you drift off when your body is all relaxed and your brain lets go on it's grip of reality a little bit.  
S: That in between space.

A: Theres not a scientific term for any of that?

S: I'm sure there is. But I'm too sleepy to think about it.

A: I do like that feeling. But I like it at home in my own bed.

S: I also like it in your bed.

A: I like right after waking up and realizing I still have time to lay in bed and watch you sleep.

S: I like waking up and feeling your whole body pressed against mine.

A: I like when you pretend you're still sleeping but make a big show of rubbing your ass against me.

S: I thought I was subtle.  
S: I like when I’m just waking up and you start playing with me.

A: I like waking up to your mouth around my cock.

S: I like 

A: ?

S: _Someone_ started snoring and it took me out of the moment.

A: I can hear it from here.

S: The only snoring I can tolerate is yours.

A: I snore?

S: YES

A: You’re lying.

S: It’s ok. The pro/con list of things I like about you in bed is stacked in your favor.


	36. The Reminder

Spencer made his way down the stairs to where the team was gathered around Prentiss' desk. A mirror of the morning's events. This time Spencer imagined they were all waiting to see what came of Rossi's "meeting" with Strauss.

"-they could be the FBI's Brad and Angelina." Garcia was saying. "But like, a gay version. Who's a famous gay couple?"

The team thought for a moment. 

"That blonde guy who played that kid doctor?" Morgan offered. "And, you know, whoever he's married to."

Garcia slapped him in the shoulder. "This is exactly why the FBI needs more gay representation!"

"Garcia, I don't think these guys are going to be walking the halls holding hands." JJ laughed.

"I wonder if they'll even stay here." Emily said. "Or if Strauss eases up and they somehow get away with never coming out?"

Spencer thought about that as he listened to his friends ponder the outcome of today. Would they get away with not coming out? Spencer doubted it. It was a comforting dream that he had wished for all morning but knew he wouldn't get. 

When he and Hotch started sneaking around it was because it was fun and hot and safer than facing the consequences. They could always cross that bridge later, and Spencer had always viewed it as a bridge that they'd be forced to cross. This certainly made it seem forced, but the more the idea of it settled in Spencer's mind he thought maybe he wasn't as reluctant anymore. They were, after all, at a place where all their next steps would have to involve the team. Where he _wanted_ it to involve the team. He and Hotch had built this life but didn't get to share any of it with their family. Their wedding would be terribly boring if they couldn't invite anyone to it.

Wedding? Spencer shocked himself with how casually he had thought of that. And he wasn't freaking out, so he thought. After all, he always considered he'd be with Hotch the rest of his life. It seemed so natural. A year ago Spencer would be panicking, but he supposed he had changed considerably in regards to his experience with relationships. He was in a solid, mature, strong partnership and wow did that sneak up on him. So much so that his fear of abandonment didn't even have time to sabotage it. Rossi was right things had been changing, and for a while now. 

While Spencer worked through this sudden and yet not at all sudden emotional journey the team kept discussing their "case". 

“Garcia,” Emily asked tentatively, “In no way do I want to sound like I agree with Strauss but... how come you haven’t traced the phones?”

Once again put on the spot Garcia didn’t immediately respond, but this time not out of anger. “I, um, I was going to but Hotch said it was more important to focus on the site itself and then I went down that rabbit hole and then also my computer.. uh, my computer started to act up! Yeah one of them must not have updated with the rest of the system it’s running really slow I had to restart it and then that became a whole thing- you know my system is very complicated and it takes all of my genius power to keep it running at the magnificent speeds it does-”

As Garcia made up excuses about her broken computer Spencer was struck with a memory. _He knew who did it!_ He quickly darted from the room, not caring if the team saw his sudden reaction. He raced out the BAU and turned right at the elevators. He was getting to the bottom of this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok references are bad BUT I always just imagine criminal minds in the past so B&A would theoretically still be a thing and also I could not think of any really obvious gay couples so... *shrug guy emoji*
> 
> I gotta go back to work on Friday so I'm tryin to knock this bad boy out soon. Stay tuned. ;)


	37. Text Interlude

S: What do you want for Christmas?

A: You

S: No seriously help me out. Whats a good gift?

A: You.

S: What do you want?!

A: You!

S: What would you like that is a thing that you could unwrap on Christmas morning?

A: You

S: What did you ask Santa for when you and J wrote letters?

A: You

S: Something that would fit through the chimney

A: You

S: Ok an actual thing that you could use please

A: You

S: If you don't answer me you aren't getting anything.

S: I just passed a really nice sweater you would look great in. Not buying it for you.

S: Theres some watches in the window of the store across the way. Not even going in.

S: I'm resisting all the good smells of the leather store even though I bet you could use a new briefcase.

S: I'm on my way home. Good thing I borrowed your car so I could fill the extra trunk space with stuff for you for Christmas.  
S: You know whats in it?

A: You?

S: Nothing!

S: Damn it.


	38. The Discovery

“Sir?”

Hotch looked up to where Spencer had left the door to his office open. He hadn't even noticed he was so absorbed in how the rest of the day was going to go. Garcia made her way into the office tentatively.

“Yes Garcia?”

“I just wanted to thank you for lunch.” Hotch waited. With Garcia there was always more to it. “-and also ask you something?”

He gestured her in further and she closed the door. Closing the door wasn’t a good sign. He figured she was going to ask something personal but was really hoping she hadn’t put it together yet. Then again Garcia was one of the smartest of his team. 

Though with how long it's taking the team to put this together he might have to reassess their skills.

“It’s just, you didn’t want me to look into who these men were, you’ve been avoiding the team all day, and - and sir I mean this in the most nicest possible way, nor am I implying you haven’t been- just that-”

“Garcia!” Hotch said a little to forcibly, the stress of the day and her rambling not mixing well.

“You’ve been really moody and then disappeared all day.” She finished pointedly.

Hotch deflated and leaned back into his chair. This only spurred Garcia on.

“Sir, now I know this has nothing to do with me and I don't want to make things any worse but we've been talking about what's going to happen to these guys and I just want to help. You seemed also emotionally invested so I thought you might be trying to make this go away-" 

"Garcia."

"I mean not like go away just like, avoid anything bad, like any firings and what not." She continued. Her thoughts surely were circling the answer that sat right in front of her, but perhaps it was still too crazy for her to consider. She was so close. 

"This morning I vowed not to look them up because I respected their privacy-" Hotch knew for a fact she had started a blog about them.

"-and for plausible deniability-" She was pretty terrible at keeping secrets.

"-but if I look them up we can help them and then maybe find whoever put the site up because they were probably just jealous or something-" At this point Hotch wanted to thank whoever put the site up. Sure they had been kicked out of the closet but now he was out. Almost.

"Garcia!"

Garcia was shocked out of her rambling. She was even more shocked when she saw Hotch looking at her with an exhausted smile.

If Hotch had only a few facial expressions Garcia had about a thousand and she went through nearly all of them in the minute it took her subconscious to offer up the truth.

"Wait. No. What. It's not- There's no way- But is it? Are you-" Garcia sat down in one of the chairs in front of his desk, stunned into silence for probably the first time that day. But not for long.

"OH MY GOD."

She yelled so loud Hotch flinched. There was no way the office didn't hear that. Or at least Rossi. Hopefully he was still engrossed with making noise of his own.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry sir it's just- WOW." she said visibly buzzing, presumably with the ache to go tell everyone immediately. "I mean part of it makes sense but we just ruled you out so early because I figured it couldn’t possibly be true- I mean it’s you, no offense or anything, just that you didn’t seem like the kind of person... I mean some of those texts- oh GOD no wait no I shouldn’t be thinking about that, oh God I said so many things about those texts in front of you-”

“Garcia-”

Her eyes suddenly went wide. “Spencer! Oh my baby boy genius. It is Spencer, right?”

Hotch sighed. “Yes and I’d love if you didn’t refer to him as a baby.”

Garcia let out a nervous laugh. She hadn’t stopped smiling since he confirmed her suspicions. “Sorry, he is definitely not a child - nor is he as innocent as we all once thought.”

If he was honest, he really didn't mind Garcia's reaction. It made him smile. Despite the initial shock of such a long withheld secret being let out - and Garcia shouting so suddenly at him - he was relieved to finally let it out and talking about it was not nearly as uncomfortable as he thought.

“Wow is it nice to see you smile.” Garcia said, looking at him fondly. “Don’t get me wrong, we’ve definitely noticed you’ve been... happier lately.”

Hotch raised an eyebrow.

“Well happier by Hotch standards. You were still very focused and intense but you didn’t seem to live in your office anymore and you maybe seemed a tad more lenient when some of us turned in reports late.” Garcia smiled bashfully.

“Well you're a hard person to be mad at, Penelope.” Hotch said smiling but crossing his arms. She was right in her assessment but he didn’t want to soften his boss persona too much.

Garcia beamed and wiggled in her seat. “So! What does this mean? Are you going to tell the team?”

“I have to run something by Spencer first." He didn't miss Garcia's muted squeal at his use of Spencer's first name. "I imagine we'll have a team dinner or go out for drinks later. I'm sure everyone will have questions.”

"Yeah I can think of at least 50 and thats just since I found out two minutes ago." Garcia said. "Do you want me to take the site down?"

Hotch considered it but to Garcia's surprise he shook his head. “No actually. You said it updates in real time?”

“Yes, at least the texts from this morning came through.”

“Keep it up.” Hotch said. "I've got one more text to send."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all, we're getting close. I'll upload the rest tomorrow. :)


	39. Text Interlude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, y'all! lol real life came and punched me in the face and wont give me the time to sit down and write. Here's a little update and I promise more is coming.
> 
> Also I maaaaaybe added a few more chapters in my head so that it all comes together a bit more satisfying... they should trickle in in the next few days.
> 
> :)

S: If you could choose any place to visit right now, where would you go?

A: Wherever you were.

S: Ok then, if you could choose any place for me to visit, then by proxy you would also visit, where would you go?

A: Why are you asking?

S: Maybe I'm planning a trip.

A: A trip?

S: We should be more spontaneous.

A: Would you happen to be planning this spontaneous trip for next Friday at 1pm?

S: Well now that you say that I hear the weather is supposed to be amazing that day we should really take advantage.

A: You are not skipping the physical exams.

S: Even if it meant we could go on a romantic trip to somewhere warm where we could be alone on a beach?

A: I will take you on a vacation another time.

S: Promise?

A: What about two weeks from today at 11?

S: If I can't skip the physical then you can't skip the annual budget meeting.

A: :(


	40. The Walk of Shame

When Strauss finally left the office the team made sure to burry their heads in computers and case files to give the section chief no reason to address them. To their surprise she didn’t. With a huff she left the BAU leaving them concerned and eager to question Rossi.

“How’d that go?” JJ asked.

“Surprised he’s still in tact.” Emily quipped.

Rossi, who was very much in tact, strolled confidently towards the group with not much concern. 

“I just let her know that we didn’t profile anything in the text that should alarm the FBI. It’s all just a harmless misunderstanding.” 

“Harmless? Some of these scenarios they're texting about seem pretty dangerous.” Morgan said with a suggestive grin.

"Maybe you're just not flexible enough?" Emily said, dishing it back. Morgan whistled, once again wishing he was privy to Emily's mysterious ways.

Just then Garcia came rushing out of Hotch’s office. She had that look on her like she was eager to share and the gossip loving group rounded on her.

“Mama what are you and Hotch doing behind closed doors?” Morgan teased.

Garcia looked at him wide-eyed before shutting it down. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

She had a terrible poker face.

“What’s going on Garcia?” JJ asked, crossing her arms and moving to stand next to Morgan.

Garcia had to get out of there before the interrogation really got started. These agents were sure to break her. She was saved by a beeping from her tablet. She ignored her friends in favor of staring down at the screen.

“Penelope?” Emily asked.

Garcia’s eyes lit up again at the response to more interesting news. 

“I know who put up the website.”

Before anyone could ask her who she darted towards her office with a grizzly determination that the whole SWAT teams couldn't have stopped her. They were gonna pay for messing with her boys.


	41. Text Interlude

S: Do you regret anything?

A: Could you be a little more specific?

S: About us specifically?

A: Of course not.

S: Not even if it ends up costing you your job?

A: I'm sorry.

S: For what?

A: I'm sorry for letting you doubt how I feel in any way. I have not regretted a single moment with you. I will do better to remind you of that.

A: Actually wait-

A: I do regret taking you to that pumpkin patch.

S: But that was so fun! :D

A: Before I met you I had no idea it was possible to reach a limit on how many pumpkins you can buy.

S: Why do you think I made us take the suburban?

A: My apartment still smells like pumpkins.

S: It's still Halloween!

A: It's February!!!!


	42. The Confrontation

Spencer wove through monitors, cables and processors, his anger directing him straight back to the cave he knew Lucy was hiding in.

When he reached her office he knocked. No answer. It seemed dark, but there was enough blue light coming from a window that he was sure she was in there. He tried the door knob, then knocked harder when it didn’t open.

“Lucy?”

Still no answer, but he heard something fall, like he had startled her.

“Lucy I’m an FBI agent, I kick down doors for a living!” Spencer yelled through the door. Ok, Morgan did all the door kicking, but she didn’t have to know that.

He heard the door click but it didn’t open. When he realized she wasn’t going to open he opened slowly.

“Lucy?”

The treacherous technician had just slumped back into her chair. She was a mess of hair balled into a sweater. She had her head in her hands.

“I’m sorry!” She said through her fingers. When she looked up at him she was a mess. Her face was filled with worry and she looked at him pleadingly. “I’m so so so sorry!”

Spencer faltered, the angry speech he had been rehearsing on the way here lost to him as he sputtered. “Just- why?!”

She didn’t seem to have an answer, or if at least she was hesitant to reveal it. But he wasn’t leaving until she did.

“Why, Lucy, why did you take my private information, post it on the internet and send it to the whole office. What did I do to you that was worth jeopardizing my career and my relationship? Worth humiliating me in front of all my friends?”

Lucy looked like she was about to cry. Spencer backed off a little, affected by how pitiful she looked.

“I know, I’m so sorry. I felt terrible the minute I put it out there but I couldn’t take it back.” She said. “I’ve been hoping all day that no one put it together. I didn’t mean for you to loose your job.”

Spencer’s heart sank at her mention of loosing his job. He threw his arms up in frustration, still bewildered with the entire affair. “Why though?

She took a big sigh. “I was jealous. I guess I built it all up in my head that I was gonna ask you out but then I saw your texts when you came to fix your phone. I shouldn’t have done anything but I was mad and overreacting. I was so sick of myself and I didn’t even read most of them. I forgot about it until a few days ago.”

“I saw the two of you over the weekend. I was at the library and I saw you so I followed you a bit.” She looked up alarmed. “Not like stalked! I was just psyching myself up to say hi, but then he came up behind you and you two were laughing and- I just got so mad. I made the site after a few glasses of wine. It was so stupid. And I wasn’t going to send it to everyone, I swear I didn’t want to get you in trouble! I was going to send it to both of you, I dunno, I guess to scare you? Oh god, it sounds so crazy saying out loud!”

It did sound crazy. Even through his fury he was sightly sympathetic. But only slightly.

“The IT department has a hidden email that emails the entire building, in case we need to make everyone aware of maintenance or something. I wasn’t paying attention and then... it was just out. I felt horrible. And I’ve just spent all day trying to cover up the email so your analyst wouldn’t find me that I didn’t even think to take down the site.” Face full of tears and practically begging, she stood holding her hands together. “Please Spencer, I’m so sorry please forgive me.”

He just stared at her. The whole ridiculous day was looking him in the face. He had a million emotions going through his head, half of them anger at her, at losing his job, at the violation of his privacy. But he also just felt sorry for the woman and wanted to get away from her as fast as possible.

“Look,” he started. “An apology doesn't fix anything-"

“I know! I know I can’t fix it, and I know nothing can’t justify it. I’ve just had a really hard time since my boyfriend left me and I had put all of my happiness in that basket and then it was gone. Then I guess I just thought my crush on you was a sign things were changing, that I’d finally gotten over it. I really built it all up in my own head and I let myself go off the rails.”

Spencer sighed. This hadn’t gone at all the way he wanted it to, but he supposed nothing she said would have changed the situation. He couldn’t do anything to save his job, but he was so unbelievably grateful that his relationship stood no chance of wavering. If he ever lost Aaron, would he do something this drastic?

Definitely not, but it was still a sad thought. Luckily he never planned on having to find out.

“I appreciate your apology. I'm sorry about your relationship.” Spencer said. The anger in him deflated as he just fell into sadness. Sadness that he lost his job, at the idea of going through a break up in general. But that would never happen. It wouldn't, he was sure of it. His brain was already out of this room, out of this conversation, making his next steps. He didn't care about this lunatic, it wasn't going to make anything better to yell at her.

“Thank you. I’m so sorry I really am. Thank you for being understanding. I hope we can just look past this, I don’t know what I’d do without this job-“

“Oh you’re definitely fired.”

She looked at him in shock. Spencer just looked at her point blank.

“I might be forgiving but I don’t think the FBI is too forgiving of it’s employees who distribute classified information to the entire database and then go to lengths to hide it." Maybe Spencer wasn't going to yell at her but he sure was smug about crushing her hopes of continuing to work at the FBI. He might be loosing his job because of her, he wasn't going to feel guilty about getting a little revenge. 

Before she could react all of the screens in the office turned black. Even though it hadn't been that bright the plunge into darkness was drastic. Then, all at once, the monitors blinked back to life emanating a bright red light. Every single one of them was just a block of red staring at them. It was scary, like a warning.

Then they started to beep.

First, just one started with a solid, consistent blip. Lucy swiveled her head looking for the source. 

"What's going on?"

Then two more started. In different tones and different speeds one by one they all started chiming. It was a cacophony of annoying, buzzing alarms and Lucy was frantically trying to put them out,

"What did you do?!" She started banging her fingers on her keyboard and waving her mouse wildly but she had no control. The red lights on the screen started blinking along with the beeps. 

It was terrible. An absolute nightmare of a room to be in, so Spencer knew to take his leave. He had already known never to mess with Penelope Garcia but this just proved it.  
Lucy looked in agony over her screens. "This- You can't- All my stuff is on here, I need to use these!"

She whipped her head around to face him, some of that pathetic, crying girl from before gone and replaced with a vengeful looking woman in distress. The same side of her, Spencer imagined, that sent the email.

"I thought you were supposed to be nice!" She seethed.

"Oh I am," he said calmly. "Which is why I have a lot of people who are willing to stand up for me."

\---

He smiled wickedly at he left Lucy in the headache of her office, a fear in her eye of what the wrath of the BAU might look like.

His grin lasted all the way down the hall. If Garcia knew who had put up the site then she was bound to be close. She might already know about them even. It was only a matter of time before the rest found out. Spencer surprised himself when that didn't send him into a panic attack. Instead, he felt a spark of relief, one that threatened to spread if he would just come out already.

The team was going to know. It was going to be real. As real to the world as it was to them.

At the elevators he didn't continue into the bullpen, instead he pressed the button to go down. He wasn't worried about telling anyone where he was going, it almost didn't matter. Who was he to worry about ditching work for a bit given the circumstances? He job wasn't a sure thing anymore, but one thing was and he was all in. 

He climbed into the elevator knowing that once he came back everything was going to change.


	43. Text Interlude

JJ: Guys what is going on?

EP: I have no idea. Why are you texting, I’m right next to you?

JJ: Because Rossi disappeared and Morgan ran back to his office after Pen yelled at him.

DM: She did not yell at me.  
DM: She just won’t let me in her office.

PG: I am very busy, I promise I will eagerly announce when visiting hours resume.

EP: For someone who is very busy you sure spent a lot of the day fantasizing about two strangers doing it.

PG: Sounds a lot like someone wants the next FBI leak to be your high school year book picture.

EP: Emily disliked: "Sounds a lot like someone wants the next FBI leak to be your high school year book picture."

JJ: has Hotch come out of his office since we’ve been back from lunch?

DM: I don’t think so but that seems about right.

EP: but he hasn’t said anything about continuing to profile this couple?

JJ: and also hasn’t said anything about us not doing any work at all today.

DM: you think something is up?

EP: maybe he’s just sick of reading about ducks.

JJ: I’m sorry, who is reading about ducks?

EP: Dicks J, you know I meant Dicks.

DR: why is it that I every time I pick up my phone today someone is talking about Dick?

DM: well now we know how to get Rossi’s attention.

EP: Where is Reid? Is he on this thread?

DR: If so I doubt he’ll be texting again anytime soon.

JJ: whats that mean?

DM: He would be more likely to respond if we were actually talking about ducks.

SR: Did you know a ducks feet can never get cold because they have no nerves or blood vessels in their flippers? 

DM: There he is.

SR: So they'd be less likely to bitch about the cold 24/7 like Morgan did last month in Alaska.

EP: Get 'em Reid!

JJ: Hahaha

DM: Ok now wait a minute, we were all freezing, I know you're not gonna make fun of me for being cold in the snow!

EP: We can if you were a big baby about it.

SR: I think I may have a picture of you wearing those fluffy earmuffs the detective loaned you.

DM: Again, it was cold. I did what I had to do.

JJ: Spence, where are you?

SR: I'll be back in a minute. Anyone want coffee?

EP: Of course he went to get coffee. 

JJ: Always predictable this one.

SR: Yup, you know me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the comments. I started trying to reply to them but every time I come here I'm like go go go gotta write! 
> 
> It's crazy that this has 50 chapters. The original outline (a very very very loose outline) was like a third of that, so this baby really grew! (And I'm glad because I'm just as invested in it as you all are lol I can't wait to get to the ending!!)


	44. The Talk

It wasn't an unusual move for Rossi to be standing in his doorway observing the team as they worked - or in this case pretended to work - down below. It was nearly the end of the day and Rossi was under no obligation to pretend to do anything. No one was going to tell him to get back to work. Seniority had its perks.

It was unusual, however for Hotch to be standing and observing the team. He was not as likely to be caught standing around doing nothing. He could somehow keep an eye on the team while buried in his work, a tricky habit that he had spent years perfecting. He always knew what was going on, observing in the shadows and nudging things to where they needed with a quiet force. So what had him standing over the bullpen, scanning the room so candidly? Rossi looked over to see that the young doctor had not yet returned from whatever mission he was on.

So Hotch didn't know where he was either. Interesting.

"Looks like the team is almost back to normal." Rossi said as he slipped up beside the his worried friend. Hotch sighed, no doubt having expected Rossi to come sniffing around.

"I'm sure that wont last long." he said under his breath.

"What makes you say that?"

Hotch turned a pointed glance at the older man. He clearly had too much on his mind to bother playing games.

"Did your _man_ tell you I found him out." Rossi said with a smirk.

"He didn't have to. Your tell is that you act unbelievably smug." Hotch retorted.

Rossi chuckled and considered what he really wanted to ask about. What was most concerning him about this reveal. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"You never asked."

"Aaron."

"Would you have believed me?" Hotch placed his hands on the rails, leaning forward. It was subtle, but there was a subtlety to everything Hotch did, even his outbursts."Maybe I should have. It would have saved me from all of those blind dates you sprung on me."

Rossi for the first time looked like he didn't have a smart ass comeback. He deserved that. Aaron didn't owe him anything, and he supposed he never did bother to ask his preference before throwing potential suitors at him. 

He sighed and looked down at the team. Morgan was leaning back in a chair listening to the girls tell a story. He turned to interrupt with a joke seemingly directed at Prentiss, likely something crass given the smirk he wore while doing so. Garcia and JJ were laughing, and they only laughed harder when Emily sent a pencil flying at him from her desk. 

"Can you imagine any of us being friends if we didn't have this job to bring us together? Do you think that any of us would get this close without the threat of danger? The need to trust each other completely paving the way first?"

"You mean whether our paths would cross at all or whether our personalities outside work are compatible?"

"Whether friendship or trust came first."

Hot took a minute to ruminate on his question. Rossi knew he was taking a bit of a jab. He knew Aaron trusted them, he had always been honest with the team when it came to what mattered. Whether he was reserved about giving them information outside of the job that didn't sully his loyalty to the team. Rossi just couldn't help feeling a bit sad that the two agents had felt necessary to hide. He could understand not telling the team right away, but couldn't help feeling maybe a little slighted that his friend hadn't trusted him.

"I've always trusted the team." Hotch finally said. "And you, it's just..."

Rossi considered while Hotch found his words. He could grant his friend some clemency. There was a lot about this situation Aaron must have had to contend with over the course of his relationship. Especially how this looked to everyone else. Everyone else whose view of him would be colored by his position over Spencer in the bureau, his tragic past, his presumed heterosexuality. Even just processing any of that with himself must have been emotionally challenging. Their courtship had likely changed Aaron as much as Spencer, he thought, briefly ashamed that he immediately jumped to making it about himself. It was hard to reintroduce yourself to your own family. Aaron had established himself as this stoic, private figure but Rossi was being naiive if he thought that was all there was to the hardened unit chief.

Hotch spoke again and did so with the wisdom he usually imparted on everyone else. Hotch could turn reprimands into pep talks in the blink of an eye because he knew that honesty and truth could go both ways, be both a blessing and a curse, and he was often the one who had to walk that line. "We all have a part of ourselves that we keep locked away for only us. The parts of us that we keep closest, that we protect fiercely from this job and what it does to people. Our true selves I suppose. I don't think it's selfish to allow ourselves that."

"I suppose. Give too much of it to the job and you might not have enough to leave." Rossi admitted, well aware that Hotch was right. Rossi had his own persona he cultivated, but he had bared all sides of himself to the job in one way or the other over the years. Maybe thats why he came back. The BAU was what he knew best and maybe that went both ways. "What does that have to do with keeping this from the team?"

"I gave that part of me to Spencer." Hotch said quietly. "And suddenly it seemed extra important to keep it protected."

Rossi could feel the concern and anxiety rolling off the other man as his eyes still surveyed the office. To anyone else it would look like he was just watching everyone work, but Rossi saw how they flickered back to Spencer's empty desk more often than not. How they darted to the door when anyone walked in.

Aaron pulled out a phone but didn't do anything on it, just checked that it was there and thoughtfully examined it before putting it back in his pocket. Rossi didn't recognize it as his work phone. How had he missed that? Again it surprised him how much could hide so close to home. He wondered how many of those salacious texts were sent when he was in the same room. Sitting right next to him even.

Hiding in plain sight.

Just then Spencer walked back into the bullpen carrying a tray of coffee. As the team excitedly greeted them - or excitedly greeted their coffee - Hotch's shoulders relaxed. The anxiety was still there though. Rossi knew. Hotch was being surprisingly transparent with his tells and body language while they talked. Rossi supposed he was preparing to let his walls down a bit, to let everyone else in. And he was terrified about it.

"Aaron," Rossi started, waiting for the man to look at him. "This team is your family and families love and support each other. Even the parts they don't see."

It was an unusual conversation. Not that Rossi had expected anything from it, he didn't know what to expect anymore. At the very least he had hoped to glean some insight from his friend and maybe impart some wisdom, but it seemed he might have been the recipient instead. He did notice something though - Aaron wasn't going to do this quietly.  
Things were coming to light. Maybe he didn't know how to help Aaron with the anxiety of coming out but he knew how to handle the inevitable aftermath because he knew it would go well. He knew they would all be fine.

And he knew how to throw a damn good party.


	45. Text Interlude

A: Where are you?

S: I went to the store because we are out of mac and cheese.  
S: Are you home?

A: Yes, home to an empty house.

S: I thought you were back tomorrow?

A: It was a pretty easy consult. We decided to drive back early.

S: Yay! I'll be home soon.

A: No, now.

S: I have to pay for the Mac and Cheese.

A: Don't.

S: Are you advising I steal this Mac and Cheese?

A: Want to see you now.  
A: There is plenty of food here. We don't need more, come here.

S: Your son was insistent.  
S: He can be very demanding.

A: I want to see you!!

S: I wonder where he gets it from?

A: Come home.  
A: You can't tell but I'm using my formal work tone.

S: Well mini you is using his formal puppy dog eyes and its considerably more effective.

A: I'll give you puppy eyes if you come home right now.

S: If you'd stop texting me I could be done by now!

A: Exactly how long will it take you to get home if I stop texting you?

S: Approximately 12 minutes and 37 seconds.

A: You have 10 minutes.

S: Thats not how this works!


	46. The Other Letter

The team thanked him for the coffees and Spencer let their gratitude and affection spill over him but did not retain any of the warmness it would usually instill in him. Instead he was sad.

He had convinced himself he was gong to loose his job, or Aaron would loose his job, that this was the last time he was going to be a member of this team. He was exhausted from all the drama of the day and he was unsure of what to do next.

It was a lot.

He went back to his desk, a strange comfort that felt private even in the middle of the bullpen. Even surrounded by all these people he felt like he was isolated here in this familiar chair with all his things. It's the same desk he's sat at for nearly a decade. _His_ desk. At least for another hour or so.

The rest of the office had gotten back to work it seemed. They went milling about, typing away at reports or passing files from desk to desk. The constant ebb and flow of paperwork. Spencer was probably the only person who genuinely and honestly would miss something like that. His own desk had stacks of files he hadn't gone through. An inbox full of work he hadn't touch all day. Should he even bother? It was nearly 5 and he doubted Hotch would keep them late as no case had popped up.

He was preoccupied anyway. Everyone could probably leave now and Hotch wouldn't say anything. Even Spencer could leave and he doubted Hotch would notice enough to stop him. Hotch was suddenly being very cagey, and his reluctance to tell him about that letter worried him. Was he sparing him bad news? If it was good news he would have told him by now. He would have been excited to share.

It didn't matter, Spencer decided. Whatever it was he had a reason. He would tell him. In all his years of working with Hotch and all his years of loving him he knew that Hotch didn't do anything that wasn't in Spencer's best interest. He had never intentionally done anything to hurt him. Spencer had never trusted anyone like he trusted Aaron.

He looked back at his desk, as the mountain of aforementioned files that he was reluctant to say goodbye to. He wondered how many were Morgans. Before he could think about how devastating it was going to be to break the news to the team that he wouldn't be around to do their paperwork for them anymore, he noticed an envelope on his desk. It had the official seal but didn't look like anything case related. He picked it up. It looked exactly like Hotch's letter he had gotten from the director.

This was it.

He didn't want to open it. He wanted to put it off forever, to never open it and stay in this comfort zone. But as he thought of the implications of that he recognized that to do so meant he wouldn't be able to move on. He wouldn't be able to take the next steps towards the rest of his life - steps that he would walk with Aaron, a man he trusted and would follow for the rest of his life, whether or not he was a federal agent under his command.

He ripped open the envelope.


	47. Text Interlude

S: Do you believe in soulmates?

A: Do I believe that there is one person or people that are made specifically for us and are meant to complete us? No.  
A: Do I believe that you can love and know someone so completely and so intimately that you commit to them with everything you have, including your soul? Absolutely.

S: Wow.

A: Do you?

S: Sure, why not.

A: Well that was easy.

S: There are things science can't explain, questions that we must accept that we will never know the answer to in our lifetime, and phenomenons that are nearly unfathomable for our brains to process.  
S: And the idea that I could love someone so passionately, ardently, and immeasurably as I love you is one of those things.   
S: So who am I to say there aren't soulmates while feeling as though I have met mine?  
S: (I'll let you know if science advances to a point where they can quantifiably prove or disprove the theory, and then change my answer accordingly.)

A: Wow.

S: Your answer was good too though.


	48. One Last Text

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh MAN it's finally here I've wanted to get this out so badly! Hence my rushing through this whole story. Thanks for overlooking any editing mistakes ;)
> 
> I'll be adding an epilogue in a day or two. I mean come on, I can't end a story with out a big team party at Rossi's. And who knows maybe a few more text interludes.
> 
> Cheers, hope you've enjoyed this! Thanks for all the love!

_Spencer,_

_Not that you bothered to ask for it, but enclosed within this letter are several forms for you to fill out and return to HR disclosing your relationship to the FBI - as well as my blessing._

_In the several times we've spoken since our first meeting I have had no doubts that your intentions are just and that you were committed to staying on the straight and narrow. I fully believed you would not let yourself be subject to any temptation that might jeopardize your career. It appears I was wrong - but love is a vice I do not believe necessary to resist._

_I entrust that you will not let your commitment falter. To the job, to your partner, and most importantly to yourself._

_John_

Paperwork informing the FBI of a personal relationship between the two agents and several forms that in legal speak just promised they wouldn't do anything to jeopardize the FBI in favor of each other followed the letter. A disclosure agreement. For both of them. Spencer's heart started racing as he processed the good news. So that meant-

"There's more texts!"

Garcia came rushing into the room with her laptop, plopping it on the first desk she found. Morgan swiveled around in his chair. Emily and JJ and several other members of the office started to gather. A buzz of excitement spread across the room as people checked their phones and hurried to pull up the website on their computers.

Spencer dug for his phone out of his messenger bag, having ditched it earlier as a precaution. Its not like he could have used it. Sure enough it was blinking with a new message. He stood and started towards the commotion Garcia was generating before stopping a few feet from his desk. He didn't need to hear Garcia read it out loud - he had it straight from the source.

Garcia cleared her voice before she began to recite the messages. She had the attention of the whole room.

_Recently I was asked if I felt I had held myself to the standards of the FBI over the course of my career. I'd like to think I have, or at the very least have tried my best, to lead this team in a manor that is reflective of that._

_But in light of today I recognize that to not be honest with the team, the bureau, you, or even myself about how unbelievably important you are to me, how devoted to you I am, or how committed I am to us, just proves that I am not living with enough fidelity, bravery, or integrity to have met these standards. I have fallen short every day I pretend to be a man that is not unbelievably and transcendently in love with you._

As she read Garcia held her hand to her heart and tears were welling up behind her cat eye glasses. JJ rubbed her shoulder, clearly affected as well as she wiped a tear from her own eye. Garcia's voice faltered with emotion every now and then as she read, and the whole room hung on every word. Even the few holdouts or naysayers who wanted to pretend they weren't invested were suddenly romantics. Garcia continued reading.

_I have given a lot to this job and I will always respect the bureau and uphold my oath to serve to the best of my ability, following the rules and regulations of this institution.  
With one exception. _

_For nearly two years now I have been flagrantly disregarding the FBI's fraternization policy, and I do not have any intention on stopping. In fact I plan on making a commitment to disregard this policy for the rest of my life._

Garcia's voice trailed off with a gasp as she read the final text. She was too affected to read it out loud, but she didn't have to. Others mimicked her gasp as they read it on their own screens. The sound waved around the room like wind blowing over grass. A swell over shocked silence.

Spencer, of course, had already read it. He had read it countless times in the span of Garcia reading it to the room and had lost count by the time he noticed the tears rolling down his cheeks. He didn't process them, didn't wipe them away he just continued staring at his screen as a flood of emotions rushed through him, chasing all the anxiety and sadness of the day away and leaving him suddenly shell shocked with happiness.

_Will you marry me?"_

He knew this was coming. He had known for a while now that he'd planned on spending the rest of his life with Aaron. It was a fact, so simple he almost didn't have to think about it. So why was he reacting this way? He felt silly as a sob escaped him and he covered his mouth. His eyes were so watery now he couldn't read his phone but he continued to hold it out in front of him while his body processed this staggering amount of happiness.

"Wow kid, didn't know you were such a sap." 

Morgan's voice cut through the ringing in his ears he hadn't noticed and he was suddenly snapped back to the bullpen. Hearing the reactions of people around him, he became briefly embarrassed that he was crying around everyone. When _did_ he become such a sap? He suddenly dropped his phone as he reached up to cover his face with his hands but tears kept coming and he couldn't do anything to wipe away the smile that was forming or the laughter that threatened to bubble up.

Morgan was not the only one to notice.

"Spence," JJ looked at him alarmed, and then her eyes grew wide. She was significantly quicker on the uptake than Morgan. " _Oh my god Spence!_ "

Spencer couldn’t bring himself to say anything, he just nodded his head. When she smiled he just started blubbering more.

Next to her Emily's mouth was agape and her large eyes perfect circles of surprise. She griped Garcia's shoulder and started shaking it.

"I know!" Garcia said through sobs. She took off her glasses to wipe her eyes but she was nearly as affected at Spencer, smiling so big her cheeks were bound to hurt in the morning.

By now Morgan had put two and two together, albeit reluctantly. He stared in shock at nothing in particular and shook his head. "Wow, kid.. I mean, WOW." 

He huffed out a laugh and looked up at Spencer, who had now at least gained some control on his crying but still looked like a confused - but giddy - deer in headlights. He was suspended in this moment as if he didn't know what comes next.

Except he does. The rest of his life comes next.

He looked up at Aaron. Aaron who he knew would be standing up at the railing outside his office with a cocky grin on his face. Aaron who didn't even have to ask for an answer because he already knew. Aaron who, if he was honest, has known since the ambulance.

"You _asshole._ "

The whole team collectively gasped, or at least thats what it felt like to Spencer. The room was suddenly an audience to this moment that felt like it belonged in a rom-com, not the BAU office. He knew he had the whole room's attention and that they were staring, wide eyed at the weird, genius agent who just broke down in tears essentially admitting to sleeping with his boss and then called him an asshole. He didn't care.

His declaration didn't get any rise from Hotch who, still grinning like a mad man, slowly made his way down the steps and walked towards his partner with the swagger of a man who did not have a single care in the world. Hotch, who had built a career on not smiling, who could intimidate anyone without raising his voice, who seemingly hadn't blinked his entire tenure at the BAU, was relaxed and openly smiling. He walked slowly, as an honest man, with his hands in his pockets while Spencer continued to berate him.

"I've been worried about our jobs all day, running around trying to fix it while you've been sitting in your office all day writing a speech?!" Spencer was yelling and it only made Hotch smile more.

The whole room was beyond shocked. Actually, they had passed shocked a while ago. It seemed like they had been on the edge of their seats for hours, when in reality it had hardly been a few minutes. They didn't know what to make of the scene playing out in front of them.

So they were all relieved when Hotch finally reached Spencer and the genius climbed his boss like a tree.

Hotch hadn't even gotten to reply before Spencer was sucking the laugh out of him, his mouth meeting his so fiercely he thought he might chip a tooth. Spencer's arms wrapped around his neck and he pulled himself so close Hotch might never breathe again and he was okay with that as long as he had this, this moment, this kiss, this ending.

He wrapped his arms around Spencer, around his _fiancé_ , and pressed his hands into the familiar feel of a wool blazer, pulling him closer even though he knew it was impossible. He could feel tears on his face and didn't know if they were his or Spencer's but it didn't matter. Whats his was theirs now.

He was only briefly aware of what was happening around him, not that he was in any rush to get back to it. People were clapping, whooping, Garcia was definitely screaming. He might have heard someone whistle? He wanted to remember this moment but he also didn't want anyone else to be here right now because he wasn't altogether sure he had the willpower to stop this kiss or this connection with Spencer. Thoughts of pushing him up against the nearest desk started to creep up. _Maybe they would end up getting fired today._

But air was a persuasive resource and they finally had to break apart. Breathless, and not just from kissing, Aaron looked into Spencer's eyes ready to ask him properly, but Spencer spoke first.

"Do you have a ring?" 

Aaron looked at his lover and a twinge of guilt interrupted the pure joy of the moment as he saw the hopeful look Spencer wore. 

"I'll get you one."

"Ah Ha!"

Spencer rushed to his bag, rummaged around in it and pulled out a small black box. Now he got to be the one with the cocky grin.

"I thought it might be our last day in the office and figured everyone would want a big dramatic reveal so I slipped out to grab this. Though I hadn't gotten around to figuring out how I was going to do it." Spencer admitted. "Should have known you'd beat me to it."

He opened it to reveal a simple, classic silver ring, thin with a matte finish with a slight bevel around the edges. Hotch was beaming, probably red, and could even feel his eyes starting to get watery. He knew they'd never live this down. How was he going to be taken seriously anymore?

Spencer sank down onto one knee, his good knee, and grinned up at his boss with affection in his eyes. Hotch laughed and rolled his eyes.

"You asshole." 

Spencer was laughing as Hotch pulled him up by his shirt and planted another kiss on him. The genius nearly dropped the ring in excitement to grab Hotch back. Instead he held it close to him, clutching it between their bodies as they met, his free hand pulling Hotch's shirt below his tie, pulling his hips closer. Hotch's fingers had impulsively moved to Spencers hair, slipping up from his neck, his palms resting just below his sharp, angular jaw and his thumbs framing his features. When he pulled back he was holding his whole life in his hands, Spencer's beautiful face cradled between them, and he had no idea why on earth he gave a shit about anything else in the world.

Literally nothing else mattered.

Spencer pulled one of Hotch's hands down to slip the ring onto it. He studied it again. Somehow it was perfect, it was exactly what he expected despite having never thought about what it might look like. Not once. Maybe because he knew that Spencer would be picking it out. He knew that whatever Spencer would pick would be exactly what he wanted.

"I got it at the same pawn shop up the road where I got my first secret phone." Spencer said bashfully. "We can get a better quality one if you-" 

"I'm never taking this off."

Someone clearing their throat interrupted the two of them just staring into each other's eyes.

"So can we hug you guys already or what?"

JJ didn't waste anytime pulling Spencer into an embrace and he responded in kind, lifting her up he was so happy. Garcia attacked Hotch first, the only of them confident enough to go full bear hug with their boss. He hugged her back and whispered a "Thank you" into her hair, to which she winked and beamed at him when she finally released him.

Emily made her rounds, the shock still on her face the way her eyes bulged as she congratulated them and even wiped a tear when confronted with Spencer's toothy grin. The kid just looked so damn happy.

"I can't believe it, our little Spencer, engaged to be married." she coo'd.

"They grow up so fast." JJ added wrapping an arm around Emily and leaning into her like a proud parent seeing their child off to their next milestone.

"Kid." Morgan said from behind the girls. He didn't approach so Spencer went to him, sensing that Morgan wanted some privacy. A sliver of worry shot up the back of his spine but he ignored it. Surely his friend would be happy for him?

Morgan put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed, looking at him seriously as if trying to get a read on the situation, as if this revelation has cast doubt in his ability to sense what Spencer was thinking.

"Why'd you let me tease you about girls this whole time?" Morgan asked. The mood lifted a bit when one of Morgan's bushy eyebrows shot up.

Spencer laughed. "Like you wouldn't have teased me about this instead?"

"Oh hell no." Morgan said seriously. "I like my job."

The tension eeked out of Spencer as Morgan smiled and tugged him in for a hug. Spencer squeezed him back and knew that they'd inevitably have a longer talk about this later, but he felt confident that it wouldn't end badly.

"I mean, Hotch is a scary guy." Morgan said while they hugged. More seriously he added, "But if he hurts you in any way Pretty Boy..."

"I know, I know." Spencer said dismissing him.

Morgan eyeballed him. "You don't think I can take him? Huh? Don't think I wont Reid."

Spencer was laughing as Hotch walked up to join them, no doubt aware of what was happening.

"Whether or not I can beat you isn't relevant." He said. "It would be fending off the entire team at once that worries me."

Morgan laughed. "And don't you forget it." 

The two men shook hands and Spencer smiled. He was right, if anything did happen between the two of them he knew the team would jump to protect him, no questions asked. He wondered if anyone else had threatened Hotch yet.

Thankfully it would never come to that.

The crowd that had gathered to witness the spectacle gave their congratulations as well. Nearly everyone in the office had shaken Hotch's hand and Spencer even shook a fair amount, too engrossed in the feeling of being engaged to worry about correcting anyone.

"Alright that's enough fun for today." Hotch's voice cut through the entire office. He was suddenly Unit Chief Hotch again. Just like that, in the blink of an eye. The room immediately hushed. Guess he didn't have to worry about still being taken seriously. "That's also enough work for today. Any reports can be turned in tomorrow morning and just a heads up - I will likely be in late."

A few people hollered as Hotch turned back to Spencer and grinned at him. The juxtaposition of Hotch being commanding and that heat behind his eyes had his knees weak. 

"Ok we HAVE to celebrate!" Garcia shouted at them all despite the whole team standing next to each other, well within ear shot."

"There is a bartender and caterers setting up at my place as we speak." Rossi announced. "Penelope is right this is cause for celebration and plenty of wine."

"You had me at bartender." Emily said.

"That was fast Rossi." Morgan said.

Rossi shrugged. "I just have a sixth sense to when we're going to need a party."

"He knew." said JJ.

"Of course he did." Emily rolled her eyes.

Rossi turned onto the newly engaged couple. "I know you guys are probably eager to do a little celebrating of your own," Spencer swallowed, hoping that it wasn't that visibly apparent. "But there has certainty never been anything more worth celebrating than this. I expect you both at my place and I expect you both to drink plenty of wine."

"Why do we need to be drinking?" 

"Because the team is going to have a LOT of questions." Rossi smirked and followed the rest of them out.

Realization struck the men as they realized they weren't quite out of the park yet.

"You ready for this?" Spencer asked. He flattened Aaron's tie and rested his hand on his stomach, smoothing his thumb next to it where he knew a scar lived. It was strangely intimate for the middle of the bullpen, but the rest of the office was too busy quickly filing out. No one was going to miss out on a rare opportunity to be out of the office by 5.

Plus they had already given everyone quite a show. Why go back into hiding?

"Yes. But first-" Aaron was resolute and that fire was still in his eyes. He hardened his glare and stepped closer into Spencer's personal space. The genius, caught off guard, held his breath. In a low, stern voice Aaron asked, "Can I see you in my office, Dr. Reid?"

Spencer had never moved so fast in his life.


End file.
